Teacher I Am, Suck Does My Life 01/21/2006 12:10 a.m.
I am so tired of my shithead students--I want to scream!
need I say more? I am currently Frustrated
Poetry? What Poetry? 11/11/2005 04:15 p.m.
I have not figured out yet how to find time to write poetry... I miss it soooooo much but am sooooooo busy all the time! Any suggestions out there as to how to find the time?? I mean, here I am sitting in lunch detention (because I assigned it to 2 of my students) and I'm writing on pathetic for the first time in forever... I'm trying to use my time wisely... but doesn't always work... well back to class... at least it's friday... I am currently Melancholy
I am listening to silence (thankfully)
Teacher versus Student 09/09/2005 06:57 p.m.
I had someone ask me why I wasn't excited about the pep rally... Well, things seem quite different from the other side. I remember in high school absolutely LOVING pep rally days. I mean, you get out of class, you get to hang out with your friends, you get to yell and scream to your heart's content, and all the other obvious reasons. But now, I'm realizing things aren't so great as they seemed back then. A pep rally from a teachers point of view is, well, not that great. I just found myself wishing I was back in high school. I miss having fun and not stressing over real life issues. I want to retreat to that time of my life. After the first week of school (as a teacher), I'm more exhausted and drained than I ever had been as a student.
I miss youth and innocence... (this coming from a 21-year-old) I am currently Exhausted
is it the end or the beginning? 06/26/2005 02:33 a.m.
so, i'm sitting here drinking alone and posting on a site called pathetic (don't get me wrong, I love pathetic... but at the moment, I quite simply feel pathetic myself)
anyways, I've been pondering... is it the end or the beginning? I mean, I finally have a full-time job (thank god the job search is FINALLY over!), so I should be happy, right? But I'm thinking, they all say that your college years are the best years of your life. Well, those years are over, despite the fact that I may go to grad school one of these days... but no more college life in the sense of Girls Gone Wild, no more frat parties, no more babbling idiocy without the fear of being called a "babbling idiot" (in college, it's a normal thing... it's actually quite weird NOT to feel like a complete moron occasionally).
So really, I have no clue what I should be feeling now (other than what the toxins in my bloodstream are telling me). But, I must continue with life (being that I can't stop time--I wouldn't be in this dilemma if I could) regardless of whether I'm beginning a new, exciting (or possibly monotonous) period in my life or ending an era, which I'll never forget...
I am currently Pathetic
It's been a while... (like the song) 02/20/2005 02:01 a.m.
Wow, I didn't realize how long it had been since I'd been on pathetic. I just have no time anymore. I should be grading papers or writing lesson plans now but I'm too exhausted.
I was a bit sad today... It was very weird. I was listening to some old music (like from 10 years ago before I was even in high school), and I just felt depressed... music always arouses vague memories within me and today was no different. I wanted to revert back to childhood. I think teaching 9th graders makes me miss high school, the immaturity, the carelessness, the friends, the thought that the future is so far away....
I'm also very sad and concerned about someone very dear to me, and I wish there were something I could do for him...
another gloomy day has come to a close
I am currently Gloomy
Let the Student-Teaching Begin... 01/27/2005 12:35 a.m.
So, student-teaching began last week... and I only went for 2 freakin days because of a holiday and 2 snow days. And this week, 2 more snow days. I should be happy about this (and I kinda am) but I feel like I will be thrown into teaching next week without knowing my students. And I'm not thrilled about teaching The Odyssey. I mean, how am I supposed to get my high school freshman excited about something that I skipped segments of the reading from my freshman year of college? Oye, not looking forward to it.
I think the snow days also were depressing because I had no one to enjoy them with (other than my mom, but that's kinda lame and she is starting to wear on my nerves). It just sucks to be home with no friends. I did talk to a friend from high school online a few days ago... hadn't talked to him in at least 2 years, if not more. So, it was nice to hear about his life now :) and it involved politics of course, I would never expect anything less. I totally will vote for him if he ever runs for President (which wouldn't surprise me).
Okay, so I'm rambling because I'm lonely. This is sad. Well at least I have 2 TV shows to watch tonight. If you don't watch Alias, you suck because that is the best freakin show EVER! Okay, going now...
I really have not been poetically inclined at all lately. This isn't like me... it worries me that no thoughts have come into my mind recently. It's as though I've become numb & dumb to the world. *sigh* I guess I will try to write something poetic soon...
I am currently Troubled
I am listening to my dad playing the fiddle (oh the joys of being home again haha)
Been so very busy since I've moved back home... Haven't had time to think until now. The day I moved back home, I also went to Stephanie's wedding :) and went to a Christmas party with the English dept from the high school where I'll be student-teaching... boy was that a long day. The party was interesting... There was a gift exchange, but presents could be stolen. I almost came home with huge bottles of Kaluah and Bailey's Irish Creme. But I ended up with a mini martini shaker haha. The teachers told me if I don't drink already, they'll have me drinkin by the end of the semester haha. One of them even gave me a drink with alcohol in it and said, "I just thought you might need this by now." jeez, didn't know teachers would be such heavy drinkers haha. It definitely was an interesting night. Other than that day, it's just been relatives, etc. for Christmas. Now that the holiday is over, things have calmed down and I have time to think about the semester ahead and the future and everything that is depressing. I've been having random spurts of sadness during times when I shouldn't be sad. Just hope it doesn't get worse...
(So many of the songs on the American Idiot CD are quite depressing and express how I'm feeling... haven't decided if it's a good thing I bought the CD yet)
I am listening to American Idiot CD by Green Day
last night 12/18/2004 05:14 a.m.
i can't believe this is my last night living at longwood... i don't want to go to bed because it's like i know when i wake up, it'll all be over. so i'm just sitting here staring at the computer screen... gahhh! i do need to get some sleep though b/c it's midnight and it's going to be a looong day tomorrow *sigh* ~good night world I am currently Sad
I am listening to mr brightside by the killers