|Member Comments on this Poem|
|Posted by George Hoerner on 10/31/11 at 01:10 AM|
It's tough when it's over but you can't let go. Been there done that. I had to move 600 then 800 miles away. But you still take things with you.
|Posted by Joe Cramer on 10/31/11 at 03:03 AM|
... so excellent!!!
|Posted by JD Clay on 10/31/11 at 04:16 PM|
To conjure love in ones head is to abandon ones heart.
To conjure love in ones heart is to make good use of ones head.
I can feel the raw emotion flowing throughout this entire poem, Lori. Upon second read I feel it coming through like a song with lovelorn verses tangled in a never-ending, hankering melody spinning like a recurring dream.
|Posted by JJ Johnson on 11/01/11 at 03:57 AM|
Dazzling! I can feel this poem, have felt this poem and know how hard it is to tell when fantasy becomes real love when felt from afar. It never falls away like the love that ends when two lovers find some other one. The lingering feeling always insulated from the cold can keep warm nestled in its secret cave, waiting for the sun to come out again to repeat the leap into passions imaginary pool. The hard part is to know when the time is just right to take the dive and and revive the words that went unsaid from the tip of your tongue to embrace the melody longing to be sung. jj
|Posted by Kristina Woodhill on 11/01/11 at 04:05 AM|
I enjoyed the phrasing in this. This is a very hard place to be, it seems to me, and you express your longings with such depth. A great song, here, Lori.
|Posted by Ken Harnisch on 11/01/11 at 12:31 PM|
I know these are lyrics, Lori...but oh so true and heartfelt as poetry. My favorite stanza and the one that hits home: "I wish a wish that isn't coming true/what am I supposed to do with a love that rules
as these candles burnt a heartache
/and all hope is when I close my eyes to dream
oh but I just wish to see your face again
/so I could tell you what I'd wished I'd said then"
Been there, wished that
|Posted by Glenn Currier on 11/01/11 at 10:48 PM|
I found myself imagining singing this after losing my love and the sadness and longing weighed in. When someone is so entangled in the heart it is impossible to see with alone-eyes anymore - you capture that so beautifully here. Thanks Lori.
|Posted by Chris Sorrenti on 11/02/11 at 01:57 AM|
Longing and regret aptly expressed Lori. I also like the bravery of reaching out to that other person to ask if they feel it too, despite the fact they may not.
|Posted by Elizabeth Jill on 11/03/11 at 02:14 AM|
The sadness and plea in this can be felt in every verse. I feel my own heart wrenching by reading it. I hear music alongside and I can the salt of every tear.
|Posted by Elizabeth Jill on 11/03/11 at 02:16 AM|
can taste the salt
|Posted by Leslye Writer on 11/03/11 at 11:21 PM|
when you're not here to say
that yesterday is still today.
I heard that from my brain all the way down to my feet. nods I hear it.
|Posted by Gregory O'Neill on 11/05/11 at 06:59 PM|
Well, you've said it and and asked the right questions. Love your lyricallity!
|Posted by Tony Whitaker on 11/07/11 at 09:22 PM|
As always I am intrigued by your creativity in style and form. The quality immediately caught my attention and the song from your heart made mine beat harder! This was even better the second time I read it. Absolutely beautiful again Lori!
|Posted by Morgan D Hafele on 11/09/11 at 10:51 PM|
this is an amazing write, over flowing with longing. i love the pace and the rhyme and repetition. a song within itself that deserves to be sung. thank you for sharing this
|Posted by Philip F De Pinto on 11/24/11 at 04:18 PM|
living is smoke as is loving but when it is juxtaposed and made solid with language of which you are both recipient to and mistress of, to be able to captivate as you do, so regularly; a language which you wave in our eyes casting spells, the thrall of which will not soon fade away.
|Posted by Jody Pratt on 11/28/11 at 05:50 AM|
I could say all this to my last girlfriend. :/
|Posted by Joe Cramer on 01/30/12 at 06:33 PM|
... congrats on POTD!
|Posted by Maria Massarella on 01/30/12 at 11:16 PM|
Lori, your dream-poem is a song I could listen to on replay...Congratulations on POTD!