|Member Comments on this Poem|
|Posted by Laurie Blum on 09/23/09 at 03:54 PM|
This is such a vivid image! It really provides a perfect glimpse at the exuberance at the ending of a school day! Nicely written Shannon...
|Posted by Charlie Morgan on 09/23/09 at 04:00 PM|
...shannon, laurie says it all: so neat to be "in" the moment w/ kids...adulthood loses so much freedom...imagery, too cool.
|Posted by Timothy Burns on 09/24/09 at 05:31 AM|
I second El, I love that line about fat seagulls!
What a great poem! Welcome to Pathetic!
|Posted by Philip F De Pinto on 09/26/09 at 07:34 AM|
powerhouse imagery, Shannon.
particularly that last line.
|Posted by Jo Halliday on 09/26/09 at 07:20 PM|
The whole poem is like a haiku; sharply etches the moment, and says so much.
|Posted by William Brunk on 09/30/09 at 09:37 PM|
painted very clearly. i could see it all.
|Posted by Tony Whitaker on 10/01/09 at 07:17 AM|
Hi Shannon, I had to check out your library after commenting on my latest haiku. I clicked on the first, which is this real beauty. I absolutely love the unforced alliteration, simile and imagery use. Keep Writing!!!!