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amid the chaos

by Chris Sorrenti

there is clarity

i eat a banana

glass of milk

half a lorazepam

reset button of sorts

to keep the

within / without

at bay

yet still they come

some nights

every hour

on the hour

a few delight

others entertain

those that frighten

deserve a cigarette

or two or three

the cats

sleep away from me

when I am like this

unless loved ones come to call

at a garden party

under a reassuring sun

laughter and gaiety

regale all around

though I don’t recognize anyone

but my mother sits close by

and the pain in my heart

i feel during the day

for a little while

goes away

after a time

she abruptly stands up

says it’s time for her to go

and with her own unique brand

of wry humor

in a hesitant smile

states she doesn’t think

i am ready to follow

where she has to go

next day

i catch a few winks

on the bus in the morning

then again

on the way home

in the afternoon

a few more zzzs

during my lunch break

where for whatever reason

in these places

the dreams do not come

getting me rested

for tonight

and the ones ahead

© 2012

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Author's Note: The second opening poem in This, That, And A Few Other Things, following the opening piece, Prequel.

Posted on 09/11/2012
Copyright © 2021 Chris Sorrenti

Member Comments on this Poem
Posted by George Hoerner on 09/11/12 at 01:18 AM

I like this Chris. My wife with my doctors help have me on something so that I am not so "depressed". What ever that means. Now being 3/4's I am not sure how you can not be depressed but I don't really believe I am. I don't remember much in the way of dreams if I have them. I accept life as it is although I'd love to be able to change a few things. Take care.

Posted by Kristina Woodhill on 09/11/12 at 04:14 AM

Man, sleep and dreams - I can feel the chaos in this routine - age messes with my nights, but I am not visited by nightmares. I like your inclusion of the cats giving a wide berth at these times. The garden party with your mom is intriguing. I like the physical structure of this piece and the irony of your catnaps on the bus that get your prepared for the coming night(mares).

Posted by A. Paige White on 09/11/12 at 04:34 AM

This one is really interesting to me since I had some kind of dream last night that stayed with me all day during the day following. Never could actually remember the dream itself, but had dejavuish moments several times an hour all day. It didn't seem nightmarish, but it's like the dream has haunted my day today and I don't like that. This poem has the same feel, like your day was haunted as well. It feels better just knowing I'm not the only one. Normally I don't have trouble getting to sleep, but here I am... reading your poetry about not sleeping at night and napping in the day...

Posted by Gregory O'Neill on 09/11/12 at 06:27 PM

This is a goldmine of relatability. Seems either we have no dreams or we have interesting ones.We need to learn to be awake in the same way:either not at all or in an interesting way. Excellent write! A vote for potd. Delighted.

Posted by Christel Crews on 09/12/12 at 01:37 AM

dreams have a way of keeping the rest we so desperately need just beyond reach. i'm a dreamer and often wake up throughout the night because of something i dreamt. sending rest-filled thoughts your way..

Posted by Joan Serratelli on 09/16/12 at 02:33 PM

I take Klonopin (clonazapam) or I'd NEVER sleep. I do not dream. The last time I dreamt,I had a very "surreal" visit from my late parents. I woke up feeling somewhat consoled; believing they were still part of my everyday life. Your poems are always awesome.

Posted by Colleen Sperry on 09/16/12 at 03:49 PM

loved it

Posted by Marjorie Anne Reagan on 09/16/12 at 05:08 PM

Like some kind of restless purgatory the creative soul seems. I understand more than you know Chris. Thank God we have someone greater to turn if all over to there in lies the only peace. How many times have my poems come at three am. Peace to you.

Posted by Lauren Singer on 09/18/12 at 12:48 AM

oh can i ever relate to this. beautiful piece, close to home. even if it wasn't, it'd be gold.

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