Driving ruthless down too many highways
Oceans crashing overhead during a hurricane
"We're so sorry, Uncle Albert"”
Playing on the radio
And later, always in the background of my mind -
Passing fields, livestock,
Children playing in their yards.

Watching my mother white knuckle her way
Through the tunnels,
Over the bridges,
Across entire continents.
She always moved us.
I slept my way from town to town.

Learned to make new friends in a flash.
Me, always the new kid,
Always the fat girl,
Always the teacher's pet,
Always the last to be picked for kickball.
Merciful or disappointed at the pick,
Never disappointed with the kick.

I could bench press 300lbs by the 8th grade,
None of the girls called me names after that,
And the boys offered compliments
In frightened voices.

I've lived everywhere,
Always felt nowhere.

I crave it still,
Some sense of permanence,
Elusive,
Sand always slipping through my fingers.

At least I know now
That no man will bring it,
No home will ensure it,
And maybe I can even live without it.
In the long run,
On the move forever,
It's all I've ever known anyway.

All these 45 years of moving,
Feeling every change to the core,
Wearing it all on my sleeve,
Gypsy intensity,
That's me.

08/19/2008

Author's Note: I was shocked to count up the number of times I've moved more than 60 - in over 22 cities. Update 09-09-09 - One more move comin' up *sigh* Update 04-10-11 - Make that a total of 62 moves, 23 cities. 01-05-12 Make that 63 moves, 24 cities 10-27-13 65 moves, 25 cities.

Posted on 08/20/2008
Copyright © 2025 Alison McKenzie