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Loneliness, my Arizona
by Julie AdamsThe L juts into my abdomen
like a cramp, a bursting appendix, cacti even
I imagine. Awe cripples my arid tongue.
Burrowing beneath my rabid pen, a blue
river of unshed tears, ever trickling and drying
streams of cobalt ribbons—wishes, dreams
set free—deep veins of my Arizona wide open.
Under the yawning sky, red-eyed and rusty
sandstone cliffs call me to their cracked edge
where coral pink sand-thoughts breathe
and twirl through me in circle spells
Across the gaping expanse, I reach for the elements—
a heavy cactus-hand finds me, pricks me, holds me
its milky truth and visions churn beneath
its thick bumpy skin; like life—
it begs to be touched. 11/02/2007 Author's Note: A poem born of the topic: Loneliness--for a writing group just started at work.
Posted on 11/02/2007
Copyright © 2024 Julie Adams
| Member Comments on this Poem |
| Posted by Quentin S Clingerman on 11/04/07 at 01:19 AM You match mood and images so very well in this very intense poem. |
| Posted by Michelle Angelini on 11/05/07 at 04:13 PM Julie, I don't think I've ever thought of loneliness in such deeply vivid terms. Your words not only describe loneliness, but help the reader to see them in terms of the Arizona desert. Even the process of writing and tears, the "...burrowing beneath my rabid pen, a blue/river of unshed tears..." is not ordinary in your descriptive style. Incredibly beautiful. I can see this writing group growing...
~Chelle~ |
| Posted by Kathleen Wilson on 11/05/07 at 04:37 PM Unusual and aching with it's subject the shape of the letter caught in the poet's abdomen is a startling, interesting and even slightly humorous touch. But then the expanse opens, the scene is painted in beautiful blues and pinks...that landscape I know... and know the awe well that it inspires, and that spreads as lonliness here in your poem. The last stanzas, come down to particulars, that can be touched, that you reach for in this "gaping expanse" (wonderul expression) ... though they may "prick" and then the unseen "visions" "churn" yes, "life" is here "beneath its thick bumpy skin" (wonderful description) and you open to it! |
| Posted by Alison McKenzie on 11/05/07 at 05:43 PM I don't think I've ever read such unusual descriptives, and it makes me hungry to see more of them. :-) |
| Posted by Maria Massarella on 11/06/07 at 08:22 PM Such richness of language in depicting this landscape of loneliness in original ways that intrigue. I love it! potd choice ...*m.a |
| Posted by Kristina Woodhill on 11/08/07 at 04:05 PM My POTD choice also! This one blew me away with the intense images. A totally unique beginning with the use of "L" jutting into the abdomen. Wow! Favs+!! |
| Posted by Ken Harnisch on 11/09/07 at 12:54 PM Loneliness is insidious enough...yearning for its antithesis in people and places of yore is a torture, albeit at times a sweet one |
| Posted by David Garner on 11/09/07 at 07:32 PM the beginning of this is just haunting. really nice. |
| Posted by Philip F De Pinto on 11/13/07 at 01:35 PM this is sheer loveliness. there is much coursing through the veins of this poem that begs to be touched. much in this poem that is alive and worthy of the name. |
| Posted by Sandy M. Humphrey on 11/13/07 at 07:00 PM Last year I fell for Arizona for one brief week and I love that you shared your Arizona with us here. The imagery weaved with emotion are excellent. smh |
| Posted by Joe Cramer on 11/15/07 at 05:31 PM Jewels, I wish that I could rate this higher! An excellent work, so poignant..... awesome! Thank you for sharing! |
| Posted by Gregory O'Neill on 11/15/07 at 09:49 PM Your touch here changes nature from a wild force to a work of art. Excellent! Thanks. |
| Posted by James Zealy on 01/14/08 at 05:38 PM Lonliness is a stark reality, devoid and empty except those prickly parts of ourselves we are forced to face, because there is no other choice at that moment. Using the arid flat lands of Arizona, ie the painted desert, is a brilliant choice to describe the dearth of life, and mind tricks we play as a result. |
| Posted by Steve Baba on 11/27/08 at 02:55 AM What a wonderful poem. Great job! |
| Posted by Kim Thevenot on 03/26/10 at 02:59 PM As an Arizonan, this touches me deeply. |
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