“Of course I care,”
I said quite honestly,
as I watched her face
contort into ghastly shapes,
wavering between disbelief
and realization of harsh reality. 

I care that I don’t harm you,
that I don’t lead you on
letting you build your pedestal
of hopes and dreams based
upon desires of chaining me
of changing me!
of relieving me of my freedom
of drowning me in a deluge
of pity and self-sacrifice. 

I care that you should be spared
that awful empty denial
that trial of senseless tears
that slow turn of the knife
while your back is turned
away from the onslaught
of the prospect of years
left without someone there,
and realizing
it wasn’t me.

11/19/2006

Posted on 08/09/2007
Copyright © 2024 David R Spellman