Mommie Dearest *OR* Solar Senryu

by Alex Smyth

Fiery passioned orb

Radiates, illuminates~

Withers with its zeal


Author's Note: Tho originally titled as an haiku, after some further consideration of the nature of that form, I decided this falls into the senryu catagory. (Thanks, QC:o)

Posted on 07/10/2003
Copyright © 2024 Alex Smyth

Member Comments on this Poem
Posted by Chris Sorrenti on 07/10/03 at 12:20 PM

Quite expressive! Can clearly see how it could represent either part of the title(s).

Posted by Mara Meade on 07/10/03 at 12:42 PM

Oh...yes. Both ways, Alex, both ways.

Posted by David R Spellman on 07/10/03 at 02:09 PM

The idea of being consumed by itself by zeal or passion relates well to both titles in this hot little number. Excellent!

Posted by Christina Bruno on 07/10/03 at 07:06 PM

excellent job :) haikus are so much fun!

Posted by Graeme Fielden on 07/10/03 at 11:11 PM

Hiya Alex, this seems to have relevance and meaning at many different levels...I am constantly amazed how mch one can fit within the constraints of seventeen syllables! Great job Alex! :)

Posted by Jeanne Marie Hoffman on 07/10/03 at 11:37 PM

Very clever! (how it can be both!) I like it very much :)

Posted by Quentin S Clingerman on 07/11/03 at 02:37 AM

Concise and brightly vivid! Perhaps not as focused as the classical haiku. Its flame flares!

Posted by Philip F De Pinto on 07/11/03 at 09:04 PM

you have managed with quite an economy of strokes to achieve the maximum fire on which we readers can toast our eyes. Bravo, Alex

Posted by Charles E Minshall on 07/12/03 at 09:57 PM

Fun read Alex....Charlie

Posted by JD Clay on 07/14/03 at 03:01 AM

A well turned verse with a call to the universe. Shine on O' brilliant one. Peace...

Posted by Mara Meade on 07/14/03 at 12:36 PM

-chuckling- Fascinating to read the comments here, Smyth. I've gotta say you done exceptionally well. And since I first read it it keeps coming back to me - how incredibly precise this is! Absolutely precise.

Posted by Max Bouillet on 07/14/03 at 03:10 PM

Great wisdom. Comparing a mother's warmth to the sun is brilliant.

Posted by Michele Schottelkorb on 05/22/04 at 07:02 PM

perfect mommie dearest... you write of her well... brilliant... blessings...

Posted by Mara Meade on 06/20/07 at 08:51 PM

And back I am again to gratefully read and remind...

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