The Journal of Paganini Jones I don't do journals but
05/01/2004 10:06 a.m.
I thought I would hide my entry essay here just in case... In case of what? Who knows! Its like all those things that you save for YEARS because you think they may come in handy, and the day after you throw then away you find out why you needed them. SO perhaps its here as a tallisman. If I don't throw it away I will never, ever need it again!
Please include the reason why you think that you would be a positive contribution to our Poetry Circle in the Essay box
How could anyone possibly say that they would be a positive contribution to a poetry circle, or for that matter, any circle? Oh it would be easy to say. But how could one be certain? How could one know? Of course one could aspire to be a positive influence. But an aspiration is only an aspiration. I aspire to so many things. I aspire to be a good poet, a published writer, thin, beautiful, well paid� the list is endless. But my desire to be any of those things does not make it so, though with continual strenuous effort and a lot of luck I might pull one or two of them off.
I would like to be a positive contribution, no doubt about it. I could promise to weigh my words carefully, to edit my writing repeatedly, to comment on 5 poems for every one of my own I post, to tread softly on the forums. And you know what? I always try to do those things, wherever I am. But would that make me a positive contribution? There are many that do as much and more, but in truth (say it softly over a glass of wine at the bar) are simply contributors who have a lot of words but little to say.
So what is left? Quite simply, I have a yearning to come home. There are friends here whose work I read but cannot comment on. One or two like, or so they say, to read what I write but don�t find it easy to access my work. The world has turned. Time has moved on. And maybe, just maybe there is a small corner in Pathetic that I could fill?
I am currently Amazed
I am listening to the hum of the computer and my husband shouting to the dog.
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