Epiphany
06/06/2003 01:06 a.m.
If that's how you spell that work, I never know. English majors can't spell, that's part of our charm. Anyway, been thinking about friendship/love a lot, especially since I saw Phoebe, my best friend in the world. I get used to not seeing her because we are always off in different directions, but after spending 10 straight days with her in Europe, I realize how much I need her and miss her. She's one of the people that really understands me and cares about me. It seems like I have allowed myself to be let down so many times in the last few months by people. Especially one person in particular. I guess I just expect honesty from my friends, even when it's harsh, and he didn't have the balls for that. Oh well. Phoebe is the only person I know where I don't feel like the friendship is temporary, or that she is only friends with me because she is waiting for someone better. I'm so tired of feeling like the person people spend time with while they are waiting for someone better to come along. I don't want to be that transitional person anymore, I want to be that best person for someone. Blah blah, bitch bitch. I guess I've come to the realization that I freak out too much about everything. When I date someone, I'm sitting there on the first date thinking "Where is it going? WHERE?" It's total crap and I guess the first step to solving the problem is realizing there is a problem, fixing it is the hard part. I just want to be asexual, and not need a relationship. I guess I'm not really co-dependent. I mean, it's been over 6 months since Marcos and I was single for 2 years before him. I think I just want the relationship "benefits" right now. If you know what I mean. I'm not ready to dive into another long-term committment. Actually, and ego-booster guy would probably be the best solution. Oh, here's a random note. Yesterday, I ate about 3/4 of a pound of See's candy. I felt so sick afterwards, but at the same time, content. Adrianne and I are planning a Girly Night for tomorrow. Facials, vodka, chocolate, Ice cream, Sex and the City, nail painting, everything. It'll be fun. Anyway, I gotta go, if I stay on here any longer, I might get fired. Cso!
I am currently Tired
I am listening to English Beat-Sooner or Later

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Home again
06/02/2003 04:47 p.m.
Well, I'm back. I had so much fun in Europe, it was great. I love the lifestyle there, though I could do without all the smoking. I went back to Hungary and saw my host family and had several "epiphanies." If that's how you spell it. Anyway, I just wanted to post some more of my shit because I've been writing a lot but I haven't really had access to the internet for about 2 weeks.
I am currently Content
I am listening to Cynthia's Humidifier

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Scarborough Computer Lab
05/13/2003 02:46 p.m.
I'm here again with Phoebe. She's writing a 2,000 word essay for school and I wanted to use the internet. Note to self, not many people are fans of deoderant here, apparently. It's so funny to listen to people talk. Phoebe's boyfriend, Sam, he not only has a thick British accent, but he mumbles all the time. I get tired of saying "What?" 5 times every time I talk to him, so I try to just smile and nod when I don't catch everything. He's really nice though. It's so weird to see Phoebe. I mean, it's not weird, it's just weird that it is like no time has passed between us at all. We saw each other and hugged and then it was like our converstaion just picked up where it left off 9 months ago. I've been hanging out with Phoebe's friend Jeff a lot. He's really cool. We got really drunk last night and he told me about 7 times about his first impression of me. He kept saying "The first time I met you...I thought you were so different. You and Phoebe kept talking about people you hated from high school. But now you're so different." He said this exact phrase to me so many times last night, but I thought it was pretty funny after 7 shots of vodka. Also, I can't really complain because I repeat everything to everyone. I'm leaving tomorrow to go back to Hungary. I am so excited. England seems just so fake European to me. But that's not really what I mean, I'm not really sure how to explain it. It seems kind of Americanized, but then they hate America, what? I dunno. I guess I'm just used to being somewhere where I can't understand people. I will be in HUngary tomorrow night, it's gonna be so great. ALL my clothes reek like cigarette smoke now, it's really sick. I need to wash them so bad. Anyway, I hope I can write down some of the cool stuff I do in Hungary, assuming I do cool things. Cso
I am currently Tired
I am listening to Typing

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Europaban vagyok!
05/12/2003 04:29 p.m.
I'm here! After months of waiting to come, I finally did it. I'm in England with my best friend Phoebe and I'm going to Hungary on Wednesday. I can't wait. I forgot how much I really missed Eruope, I feel like I'm home. The lifestyle, everything, I just love it. The only think I don't really like is all the smoking. I started a digital photography series about smoking. The cigarette packages here are hilarious. They say in huge bold letters "SMOKING KILLS!" And that it shrinks your balls and stuff. Anyway, I gotta go. Phoebe wants to go to the Pub. I'll write more if I can. Cso!
I am currently Feisty
I am listening to Jeff talk about Jackie's dress

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Europe!
05/09/2003 09:22 p.m.
I just got a call from my best friend Phoebe who I am leaving to visit tonight in England. I can't wait to get back to Europe, it is my most favorite place in the world. Anyway, I am kinda hung over and have lots of stuff left to do, so I should go. I don't know if I will be able to write while I am gone, but I'll try. Cso!
I am currently Fabulous
I am listening to The humidifier in Cynthia's room

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Faj a hatam!
05/08/2003 08:02 p.m.
My back hurts really really bad. When I turn my head, there is a pain that shoots up from my left scapula all the way to my left temple and I am so tired of it. A word of advice, do not get in a car accident, though I'm sure that's everyone's dream. I have to find a massage therapist. I sort of wish I could cut my skin open and pull out my muscle, stretch it, lay it flat and close my skin back up. It just really feels like there in a knife in my back. Not metophorically, physically. I'm leaving tomorrow night, I can't wait. I haven't been in Europe in 2 years. Anyway, gotta go, I'm supposed to be working. Cso!
I am currently Sexy
I am listening to Yeah right

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Feelin' better
05/05/2003 10:23 p.m.
I feel better already. I dunno why I get so down. It's just crappy. Anyway, I'm leaving in 4 days to go to London and Hungary, I can't wait. I got an e-mail from my host family saying that they will be there to meet me. I hate to fly, but I can't wait until I am in the plane from London to Budapest and I feel it descending. I haven't been in Hungary in 2 years and I miss it so much, it's like a broken heart. I'm afraid I won't want to leave. Oh well. Anyway, I want to say something else. My roommate, Cynthia, thinks it's really weird that I post on this website. She thinks it's weird that I have an online journal that anyone can read, so I told her I was going to talk about her just to make her twitch. It's not like it matters, I don't have anything bad to say about her, and she will probably never read this. Anyway, I gotta go, I'm pretending to work. CSO!

Corrie
I am currently Better
I am listening to Cold Play-Clocks

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Bummed out
05/05/2003 09:04 p.m.
Sometimes I just don't know what to think about people, life, blah blah. Plus, it's raining today, and that always gets me down and I had terrible dreams that brought tears to my eyes. Thank God I'm leaving on Friday, I really really need to get out of here.
I am currently Bummed
I am listening to Jack Johnson-Inaudible Melodies

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DRINK!!!!!
05/02/2003 09:02 p.m.
Finals are over!!!! I probably pulled a D in Biology, but I don't care, I'm a freakin English major. I went to Stomp last night with Morgan, it was great! I could not believe the awesome music they were making with just brooms, trashcans, etc. I am almost all moved into my apartment. Now I just need a car and everything will be perfect. Anyway, I'm exhausted. I'll probably write more later, but now I need caffine. Cso!


I am currently Tired
I am listening to Ben Harper

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2 down, 1 to go
04/29/2003 11:46 p.m.
I took 2 finals today and I have one more on Friday, thank god it's almost over. Seriously, I can't wait for this freaking crap to be done, I really can't. I am moving tomorrow. Hopefully I can get it all done. My mom just decided I have to change the tires over on the truck if I want to use it to move. Grrrrrrrrrrr. I don't think she'll follow through with it though. Anyway, I am exhausted so I'm gonna go and find a ride home. I'm so sick of this crap. Cso!




I am currently Gross
I am listening to phone ringing

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