Ten Days Left
07/20/2004 12:53 a.m.
Work flew by today... so fast... I loved it :) Now if the rest of this week could go as quickly, it would be perfect.

I am getting my car fixed tomorrow. I hope it doesn't cost me too much :-/ I will not be happy if it does.

But guess what will make me happy? Go on...Guess! Yes you've guessed it....Alan! :) Alan makes me happy! I love Alan so much! Alan is coming to be with me in ten days...Ten days left until I see my sweetie again :) Ten days until I am truly happy again. :)
I am currently Anxious
I am listening to TV

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Time To Move...
07/19/2004 01:51 a.m.
I finally got around to watching Bowling for Columbine today after owning the moving for a good 2 1/2 weeks now. (Yeah my life is hectic). I have to say that after watching that movie I am wanting to move to Canada mow more than ever. Why the hell is this country so screwed up?

So what do you say Alan? Want to just drop everything right now and move to Canada? :)

I am missing Alan so incredibly much today. It was a rainy yucky day... A perfect day to just cuddle on the couch with someone special. (Someone special = Alan) :) I get to see him soon. The wait just seems incredibly long this time for some reason and I am sure that it will only get longer each time. I can not wait until he moves down here for good. :)

I just want our future together to start now... I am so impatient sometimes... especially when it comes to love. :) Oh well.. that is me...
I am currently Passionate
I am listening to The TV in the background

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Alan :)
07/18/2004 05:28 a.m.
All day Alan...
In my head
My thoughts
My dreams
Alan Alan Alan

11 days and some hours left until I see my sweetie again. I can't wait to hold him and kiss him and make love to him. *sigh* I miss Alan so much it is unbelievable.



I, Melanie Agnes Bennett am so deeply in love with Alan Vincent Nelson.

Yay for love!!!!! Yay for Alan!!!!! Yay for Alan and I being in love!!!! :)
I am currently Feisty
I am listening to Lifetime Movie

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Two Weeks Until Absolute Bliss :)
07/16/2004 01:47 a.m.
Work was pretty nuts today. I am getting extremely tired of my job and am really looking forward to my much needed break of a few days off when Alan gets here and also my trip to Jamaica in August. :)

I did get to talk to my sweetie last night, so my sadness was short lived :) Although he sounded kind of sad when I spoke to him on the phone briefly... :-/ I hope that talking to me for awhile made him feel better because talking to him always makes me feel one hundred times better.

It is funny because yesterday at work I was talking to my director, two supervisors, and Season. My director pointed out the numerous changes I have been going through (new clothing, new hair color, happy all of the time, etc.) and Season told everyone that I was "in love". Of course I turn bright red and attempt to leave the conversation, but my director insisted I tell them about this new love in my life. So I tell them about Alan. My director asked my where he was from and when I said Maine, she became concerned that I was going to quit the agency and move up to Maine. She joked..."And he really wants to move to Northeast PA right? " I told her actually he would be moving down here in the fall because he was planning on transferring schools to East Stroudsburg. She asked what he is studying and I told her computer science and she said that she should hook him up with a job at MIS so that way I would stay with the agency. I guess I am more valued there than I thought... :)

It was also cool because my one supervisor will be up in Maine for Labor Day weekend (the same weekend that I am driving up there again) and will be only about 15-20 minutes away from Alan and wants to meet him. So she is giving me directions to the cottage she will be saying at. It will be cool to introduce Alan to Kathryn. She is pretty cool. :)

Blah Blah Blah... I feel like I am just rambling now. But I can say that I am missing Alan so much right now. I can't wait to see him again. Two weeks left. Only two weeks. I can make it :)

It appears that Alan has done some shopping for my birthday coming up... He is such a sweetie. I love him so much and can't imagine being with anyone else... Honestly I knew he was my soul mate from the moment we first started talking. I can't believe how much I love him...and how empty I feel when he isn't around.
I am currently Thoughtfull
I am listening to I Want To Know What Love Is

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Missing You My Love
07/15/2004 12:52 a.m.
I am kind of sad today because I probably will not get to talk to my sweetie :( He is going out tonight to celebrate his birthday with his friends. I just wish I could be with him... *sigh* I just have to remind myself that next year we WILL be together.

I had such an amazing conversation wih him last night. I swear I fall more deeply in love with him every single day. I know we have a future together and I know it will be absolutely incredible. :)

15 more days until I can hold him again. Two weeks from tomorrow he will be driving to see me. I can not wait I love him so much.
I am currently Blue
I am listening to More Than Words Can Say...I Need You Now

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I Miss Alan :(
07/14/2004 02:34 a.m.
Today is Alan's birthday and I can't be wth him :( I so wish I could see him right now, but unfortunately I have to wait 16 more days until I could hold him in my arms. I miss him sooooo much.

So I did decide that I can not wait two months to see him again after this visit, so I am driving up to Maine again for Labor Day weekend before the snow starts and I can't drive anywhere... ;-/ Notice I always seem to pick the worst days for traveling to travel... lol:) After getting stuck in traffic for 10 1/2 hours over the 4th of July visit, I just may stay in Maine an extra day so I can avoid all of the traffic driving back on Labor Day weekend. It might interfere with Alan's school, but I can sit around and wait for him while he is in class. Not a big deal :)

God I can not wait until hemoves down here for good. I will so love waking up with him every morning and falling asleep in his arms every night. At least then... I know that we won't be separated (excpet for work and school, but I'll be with him every night) :) I LOVE ALAN NELSON SOOOO MUCH!!

Happy Birthday sweetie! I wish I could be with you.
I am currently Loved
I am listening to I Could Fall In Love--Selena

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Eighteen days until Alan and I are together :)
07/12/2004 01:53 a.m.
Ok so I am officially a brunette now :) It is different, but a nice change. I feel like I have re-invented myself...lol:)

Hmmmm... today is July 11th. Alan's birthday is in two days. :) Also in two days, Alan and I will have been offically together for one month :) Also since today is July 11th and Alan is driving down here on the 29th....I will get to see in in 18 days! :) It is so incredibly difficult to be away from him... Way more difficult than I imagined. I hope I hope I hope ten months just flies by.

Ok so I am dreading going back to work tomorrow. After a week like last week I was questioning whether I ever wanted to go back again or if I jsut wanted to take off to Maine and start my life over up there.... Still pondering the thought...very tempting... :)

I just have to stay in Wayne County until September 15th. That fulfills my one year contract with the agency. Then technically I can go anywhere....Although I did want to stay here to finish school. Speaking of school I just got my bill today. $2987 has to be paid before August 9th. (That is how much I owe after my scholarship was deducted. Yikes! I hope I qualify for some grants or loans or something...or I am screwed.) And I will tell you right now, if school falls through here, I have no reason to stay... Blah... too many thoughts jumbled in my head (school...work...Alan...bills...dangerous clients...Maine...etc....)

I am so in love....that is the one thing I am sure of:)

Alan you are my rock...
You give me strength and make me want to be a better person
Your unconditional love is amazing to me and I can not wait until the day when I can experience it day after day...forever :)
I am currently Jumbled
I am listening to Let's Make Love (Faith Hill/Tim McGraw)

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Do You Believe in Destiny?
07/11/2004 03:23 a.m.
Do you believe in "fate"?
Do you believe in soul mates?
Do you believe that there is one person in this world that you are destined to be with. Someone you connect with immediately?
I am not sure if I did before...but I definately do now. I wonder now how I made it through the first 22 years of my life without Alan...
Alan is my other half... he makes me feel complete and whole. :) The feelings I have for him are so incredible that I can't even put them into words.
He and I were meant to be together. We have such an amazing connection like I almost know when he is thinking about me and I can read his thoughts when I look into his eyes.
I KNOW that he and I will be together forever. We will spend the rest of our lives together. I am lost without him and feel so safe, secure, and confident when he is around.
Alan is my soul mate and I love him more than anything
I am currently Amazed
I am listening to 8th world wonder

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Crazy Day
07/10/2004 04:20 a.m.
Had a crazy day at work today in which I thought I was going to be killed by one of my clients. He held my co-worker and I at his house for 2 1/2 hours and would not let us go until 4 county sheriffs arrived. Needless to say, it was a frightening experience for me. I am just glad I got out of that situation alive...

I miss Alan so much and wish he was with me. My nerves are completely shot today and he makes me feel so... safe. I need that sense of security tonight... I miss Alan so much. I get to see him in 20 days, which is good news :)

I just want to feel him again... hear his voice...taste his lips...feel his skin... be wrapped up in his arms...

*sigh* I am so in love...
I am currently Overwhelmed
I am listening to CD that my sweetie made for me :)

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Frustrating!!!
07/09/2004 02:24 a.m.
I am soooo frustrated right now. I literally missed talking to Alan by like a minute. I just walked into my apartment and heard the computer beep like someone sent me a message and by the time I got over there he was signed off :( He had to go to his mom's house and he said he would call if it wasn't too late. I hope hope hope that he calls. I don't care if it's 4:00 am....

I am really confused....I thought he got off work at 11:00 pm tonight. I made sure I was home by 10:15. :-/ Hmmm...maybe I misunderstood. Otherwise, I would have gotten home sooner so I could talk to him... :) I miss him sooooooooooo much. I can't believe how much it hurts to be without him.

Blah!
I am currently Frustrated
I am listening to Burning Ring of Fire

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