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County Zoo

by Chris Sorrenti

so you want to be a guest at the county zoo
well come right in and by the way
you won’t be needing that suitcase
just strip down to your birthday suit
and into the shower with the other new arrivals
we like to run clean show here
and if you feel the urge to squirm
or howl at the moon
then go right ahead
because nobody gives a damn
when you’re a guest at the county zoo

what’s that you say?
you had some financial problems on the outside
maybe a bum rap
and you’re looking for a little compassion
well friend there’s no animal rights group in here
and it’s too late to apologize for any mistakes you made
afterall isn’t it your philosophy that crime always pays?
till you get caught with your hand in the cookie jar

so you want to come live at the county zoo
learn the meaning of mandatory supervision
well we’ve always got room for another animal
you’ll find our services good as any institution’s
your cigarettes and deck of cards are waiting
to help cut the boredom
even color TV to remind you what you’re missing
on the outside
roll call’s at six and don’t be late
or it’s straight into solitary confinement
oh and by the way
are you maximum or minimum?

so you want to be a guest at the county zoo
and just for the record
how many levels above plant life are you?
we don’t care what you’ve done or who you did it to
as long as you behave yourself while you’re in here
and when you’ve finally done your time
paid your debt back to society
we’ll open up your cage
set you free
but just remember friend before you check out
it’s a dog eat dog world on the outside

© 1978

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Posted on 04/16/2015
Copyright © 2020 Chris Sorrenti

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