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Never have I ever meant "never"

by Angie Jenkins

I'm so disappointed that I allowed you
to become just another tally on my already
marked with the scars of painful memories and
defeated thoughts and fragmented hopes and
ugly scenic paths that I naively continue to
travel down.
I thought you would become the last tattoo
on this muddled canvas;
that somehow the road to broken promises and
endless justifications
would magically lead to something better than just
once more
tripping and trodding over the muddy remnants of this
poorly reconstructed taped up stapled ripped to shreds
mess that I have become far too used to.
"All or nothing" is a wonderful state of mind when I decide
I have nothing more to give;
when the best option is simply to collapse into this
well-worn pavement and close my eyes as the wind
picks up and carries and
buries the scraps of this weary soul
deep into the soil
where they belong.
Never again will this happen, I say to myself.
Never again.

And it won't.

At least until next time.


Author's Note: It's times like these I envy the monks and nuns of the world.

Posted on 03/29/2013
Copyright © 2024 Angie Jenkins

Member Comments on this Poem
Posted by Shannon McEwen on 03/31/13 at 07:49 PM

I've been here, well said.

Posted by Joe Cramer on 04/05/13 at 05:59 PM

... so very excellent.....

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