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From a Child with Autism

by Lori Blair

Just know now I am a child of autism

I was meant to please you all with grace

though I don't know what that's to mean

when man is against man for race

and I was told not to worry so

when the investor's son was to carry

our soul's phase with good aim

"Untrust all we don't understand"



cuz who are we if we don't comprehend?

when a sin depends upon all we might defend?


But I'm a child with autism and don't understand

all I can do is believe in the better half of humanity

while all those that hold arms say they are right

while all others are wrong and bereft?


I was diagnosed at a time when most would say

that the bible spoke enraged

I couldn't understand myself then

but though I saw more than most would

at a moment of soul doubt

Was encaged in this mind of lies

had to ponder why, me, now

when so many do not cry


cuz who are we if we don't comprehend?

when a sinner depends upon all we might defend?


I then learned more than was to learn through silence

though I wish I could have said more

than that silence of my nature, immature,

cuz who is to say race for race

should be in exchange for religion

that some believe is wrong, not right,

oh no wonder I wish you not

to hold me tight, when I'm so unsure

of delight


but then,


I learned more there was to learn

just as that silence, that, that neighbor once knew



And I watched in silence when you all grew

more unattached between few

though you had some cares and inner lines

cuz who else could defend your believed rights

while you were so attached to that, who, and now

and how I praised you for trying

but your accomplishes were unfounded lies

compounded with my demise, seen, as silence


and how I cried for all mankind

cuz I have autism but my silence isn't unnoticed


modern man can't understand

old age man can't comprehend


but God knows cuz I'm graced


I am graced by degrees


and someday I hope mankind understands these times


truly from his soul


cuz so many are


more unattached than you could ever know

more unattached than you and I could have ever known then!


cuz who are we if we don't comprehend?

when a sin depends upon all we might defend?


But I'm a child with autism and don't understand

all I can do is believe in the better half of humanity

while all those that hold arms say they are right

while all others are wrong and bereft?

and every sinner is the same?


though I remain in silence!


true to myself just the same!

True to myself just the same!



04/11/2012

Author's Note: For Brendan, my son, for Autism Awareness this month..thanks for guiding me to the true light...

Posted on 04/12/2012
Copyright © 2021 Lori Blair

Member Comments on this Poem
Posted by Elizabeth Jill on 04/12/12 at 12:48 PM

Lori, my nephew has autism. This is close to how he expresses what he's able and when he's able, if he's able on a given day. The innocence - if this innocence of thinking could only rub off on all of us *normal* people.

Posted by Mo Couts on 04/12/12 at 01:33 PM

Precious. I work with boys with autism and love all of them. They came to mind with this poem; thank you for it.

Posted by George Hoerner on 04/12/12 at 01:45 PM

For years I truly thought I was autistic but those who knew said no. One of my grandchildren is really so and yet he has clung to me and shuned others so I trust his judgement. A beautiful piece Lori and I wonder sometimes if life itself is somewhat autistic in some manner of degrees.

Posted by Joan Serratelli on 04/12/12 at 03:13 PM

OMG Lori- I was born with CP. From the time other kids (and adults) made fun of me, I considered myself a "child of a lesser G-d". If I was NORMAL, what were the other kids: MORE NORMAL?". A child know that they are different. Do I blame G-d?....NO- Do I blame my Mother?...NO-I blame the dr. I made it through. I am more compassionate than most- brighter than the norm (I've been told), stronger, because I had to be.Ihad to be tough. I had to take more than my share of mental/emotional abuse. Teach your children to have heart; to put themselves in the handicapped person's shoes. I NEVER wanted pity- understanding. I do not want to be judged on the basis of lousy speech. I am not mentally challenged, academically challenged- I am physically challenged. I'm handicapped and I hate labels. Wonderful write. Brendan will be ok- he has you!

Posted by Gregory O'Neill on 04/15/12 at 07:43 PM

...again, Brendan prove to have a kind, loving and talented mother. Bless you all. Thanks.

Posted by Chris Sorrenti on 04/17/12 at 12:56 AM

This poem reminds me that we are all here on Earth for a purpose, or as a friend once pointed out, to fulfill a contract, none any less important than the next. Nice to see you doing so well with yours, Lori.

Posted by Elizabeth Shaw on 04/17/12 at 02:15 AM

Great write and nice beat. thnx

Posted by JJ Johnson on 04/19/12 at 10:05 PM

not surprising at all that this is the top ranked poem. You know how I feel about Autism, and I wonder if you have seen the tv show "Touch" which coincidentally is the name of one of my poems about Autism. Brendan is so lucky to have you for a mom and who could be a better Happy Thought for you? jj

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