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Fanatics Need Not Apply

by Chris Sorrenti


I’ve decided to start my own planet,
where politics will be contraband,
evangelism outlawed as an illegal substance.

Fur coats will be available for purchase
at every supermarket,
beside the bacon, roast beef...and marijuana.
Fruit and vegetables also readily available,
though egg plant in permanent short supply.

To avoid road rage and knuckle heads,
automobiles will be left back on Earth;
mass transit filling the void.

Restaurants won’t be divided into
‘smoking’ and ‘non-smoking’,
however casinos will have signs posted,
saying “Enter At Your Own Risk.”

Passage to my planet along with health care
will be free. No banks are planned,
as there won’t be any real money.

And finally,
treachery or violence of any kind...
a one way ticket into outer space.

© 1998

1,540 hits as of March 2024


08/25/2010

Author's Note: Published in the TOPS (The Ontario Poetry Society) anthology, Butterfly Thunder, edited by Jeff Seffinga, Toronto, ON. circa mid-2000s.

Posted on 08/25/2010
Copyright © 2024 Chris Sorrenti

Member Comments on this Poem
Posted by Charlie Morgan on 08/25/10 at 04:52 PM

...chris, my passport is readied. cool write,.

Posted by Gregory O'Neill on 08/25/10 at 06:05 PM

To embody a new paradigm of civilization - to learn to think like a planet in order to create and nurture a planet - is not a typical hero's task. But, desire says you just may be up to it! This is great blending, sci-fi and gardening. Thanks.

Posted by George Hoerner on 08/25/10 at 08:44 PM

Can I bring my own egg plant or would that be starting a problem? I enjoy it as does my wife!

Posted by Gabriel Ricard on 08/26/10 at 12:45 PM

Great title, and that last stanza's the one that hits the hardest. Nice work, man. Really nice work.

Posted by Anita Mac on 08/28/10 at 03:43 AM

Fantastic... I'm game. I'm seeing myself as a black market eggplant farmer, actually. They rest of it sounds phenomenal though!

Posted by Carolyn Coville on 09/07/10 at 04:35 AM

Oh how fun! Nice write, it's got me thinking about what Carolyn's world would look like...

Posted by Quentin S Clingerman on 09/28/10 at 02:02 AM

I've a Home, not built with hands, where politics and evangelism are not needed! One day I will go there to be with an unnumbered (by ordinary folks)redeemed who have "washed their garments in the blood of the Lamb!"

Posted by A. Paige White on 01/16/13 at 10:07 PM

Instead of Horton hears a who, Sorrenti sees a solar system, eh? I like it! Don't have a problem about the eggplant, I only eat it deep fried golden brown on the chinese buffet and seldom even then. Really prefer fried green tomatoes anyway. Tangier. I'm a fan of mass transit and since you're the one starting the planet, that would make you the god thereof. You seem like a real nice guy... but I don't think you'd die for me, so no worries there, i wouldn't be evangelizing for ya. Sounds like an interesting place to visit.

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