by Darren Swift
he is chipped, cracked
she has tooled him badly
a poor workwoman's eye
a piece falls, shatters
she sees him breaking,
peels more veneer
petulant child she strips
ego followed by self worth
followed by simply
When all has gone, the sad
remains are flicked
Dulled, his centre fails
the core dies, from a distance
she watches the end
her work here is done.
Posted on 07/14/2010
Copyright © 2022 Darren Swift
|Member Comments on this Poem|
|Posted by Alison McKenzie on 07/14/10 at 02:16 AM|
I can see the satisfaction from her perspective, and how deadly the absence of self-respect from his perspective makes it seem like her fault.
|Posted by Kristina Woodhill on 07/14/10 at 03:45 AM|
Yikes - this is so sad and brutal, vivid images.
|Posted by Charlie Morgan on 07/14/10 at 11:49 PM|
...darren, and then she moves on, eh? a kicking-good write, no prisoners...
|Posted by Marcus Lane on 07/19/10 at 06:09 AM|
A powerful poem, Darren, Excellent. (Interesting to see the perspectives others take from the same words!)
|Posted by Kristina Woodhill on 01/27/17 at 04:37 PM|
Still a vivid, killer piece after all these years. Congrats on POTD!
|Posted by Sigurdur Haraldsson on 01/28/17 at 06:34 PM|
I saw this in "Top Rated Member Poetry". Beautiful imagery.