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Eulogy
by V. Blakei found him curled up on the concrete
looking like a blissful albino shadow
stretched too far for the twilight
and too thin for the chalkline
he no doubt traced for himself
on the sterile cellar floor.
i don't regret intercepting the gaze
he had fused to the event horizon
on the far side his personal abyss,
but ever since that moment,
he'd been none too magnanimous
when it came to explaining
how sipping paint thinner
from a hand-me-down styrofoam cup
was gonna wash his ghost clean of metaphor.
06/15/2010 Author's Note: Agreed with Alison's advice and scrapped what were the last two lines.
Posted on 06/15/2010
Copyright © 2024 V. Blake
| Member Comments on this Poem |
| Posted by Anita Mac on 06/15/10 at 02:03 PM Gorgeous and gut-wrenching. |
| Posted by Alison McKenzie on 06/15/10 at 06:36 PM God. Just one note. For me, the last two lines stole the punch of it. |
| Posted by George Hoerner on 06/15/10 at 09:20 PM Great write Vince, most of us have no idea about the conditions some people live and die in. Would make any difference? I have no idea as most seem to play at this game of life. Again great write. |
| Posted by Glenn Currier on 06/28/10 at 01:37 PM All very poignant, my man, but the lines that cut through to me was: "i don't regret intercepting the gaze / he had fused to the event horizon" - because I have not had the experience of that gaze and suspect I WOULD regret it. If this poem refers to a real event, then I would say that you didn't regret the moment speaks well of your character. Wonderful, quite wonderful poem, Vince. Congratulations and kudos. |
| Posted by Elizabeth Jill on 07/11/10 at 03:06 PM Vince, Vince, Vince! Every time I read your poems, I feel giddy and inspired!
"how sipping paint thinner
from a hand-me-down styrofoam cup
was gonna wash his ghost clean of metaphor."
*incredible visuals and creative writing!* |
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