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A New Patio - A Valentine Present to Myself
by Darren Swift
the gravel took me two days
the sand one; raked, re-raked,
levelled lovely, flat, formless.
I mixed the concrete by hand,
shovelled, spread, stretched
muscles straining to cover all.
Sandstone flags follow string
lines to set depths, perfection
attained through bubbles in glass;
gently tamped when needed until
all sixty four lay side by side,
squared away in eights.
Only then do I allow a pause,
lean back, stressed haunch held
casting my critical eye over
the surface and wondering what
words of criticism you would
share
If you were not under it.
02/03/2010 Posted on 02/03/2010
Copyright © 2024 Darren Swift
| Member Comments on this Poem |
| Posted by Kristina Woodhill on 02/03/10 at 03:56 PM Oh, this is so dead level good - tamped to perfection,;) not a hint of what lies beneath until that last simple line. Well done. |
| Posted by Paganini Jones on 02/03/10 at 04:48 PM Oh this is wicked - love it! I hope you are going to enter it in the valentines poem competition (hell)... Unless you have something even better of course? |
| Posted by Sandy M. Humphrey on 02/03/10 at 06:14 PM Wow, it has a careful loving work detail and then you get us with the clencher, what would they think? Twisted. smh |
| Posted by Therese Elaine on 02/04/10 at 01:57 AM Hah -very grim bit of humour done in a most clever fashion -it speaks to the horror film lecturer in me!! Well done! |
| Posted by Clara Mae Gregory on 02/17/10 at 02:20 AM I got a kick out of this. :) |
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