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Means to an End
by Alison McKenzieI lay in bed all morning,
Unable to rise,
The last thing you did to hurt me
And the last thing I said about it
Weighing me down,
A heavy iron drape,
My heart in bits and pieces
I cant seem to gather up.
I wonder how I can get out from under it.
Inside myself,
I search for my
Container of magic empty.
I look for tolerance,
There is a little left, but its been infested
With some sort of bug that renders it fetid.
Love has been missing for weeks now,
And though I look with diligence,
I cant find that part of me anywhere.
Everywhere I search,
There is only emptiness,
Except for a basement full of anger
And I am loathe to go there again
Just to feel.
My weeping echoes along
Unadorned walls and corridors void of
Any other sign of life.
For the first time ever,
I dont know what to do,
My will stripped bare
By something bigger than me
That I cannot seem to stop.
Your indifference haunts me,
Your wordy determination to make us work
Finally drained away by
Time and pressure,
The inevitability of doing nothing
Proving to be a decision after all.
My eyes are swollen.
I am a vision of ugliness,
And I see no way out.
07/23/2008 Posted on 07/23/2008
Copyright © 2024 Alison McKenzie
| Member Comments on this Poem |
| Posted by A. Paige White on 07/23/08 at 07:35 PM Oh darlin. I'm so sorry. I wish you lived closer. I'd take you somewhere for some chocolate to drown ourselves in. Gosh I hate to read this. I've been there myself, so many times with Chip, I know the darkness of that depth of misery very well. I wish I could just be there to give you a big hug and let you cry on shoulders that have been wet with tears as well. love to you sweetest ali. |
| Posted by Charlie Morgan on 07/23/08 at 09:40 PM ...your vision is distorted!...you are looking at the injuries...we see a full, feeling, caring heart and a wordician, so why come you don't come out and play...let them stay inside, even in the basement, but bring yo'self out gal, you got a smile that would melt that chocolate Paige has for you...too much love out here for you miss Thang, mine comes allllll the way from dallas...hugs... |
| Posted by James Zealy on 07/23/08 at 09:59 PM Unfortunately where the heart is concerned there is no panacea, no clear definition to resolve the pain, only resiliance. Peace be with you Ali. |
| Posted by Kristina Woodhill on 07/23/08 at 10:47 PM Ah, this is a heavy iron drape, indeed. So sorry this is happening, and I hope the tears and this writing have helped clear the field a bit and shown some sun for you. There is nothing ugly in you. |
| Posted by Sandy M. Humphrey on 07/27/08 at 04:44 AM Days like this are hard, that is when we have to dig deep and find in ourselves self love and hopefully a friend. I have been where you are and poetry heals lady it really does. smh |
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