am I neurotic, psychotic or just plain scared
got knocked on my ass
oh I didn't see that coming
never properly grieved,
changing of direction
from someone to no one
lost my voice and standing
mired in that strange and foreboding wasteland
of lawsuits and litigation on those turbulent legal seas,
lost control, so foreign to me
of all that I've ever known and believed ...

I must learn to walk again, gather my resolve
strengthen my mind
lose the fear, cast away this doubt
ever pressing, ever present, ever looming larger
creeping close to destruction if I only succumb ...

there are times I feel like giving up
toss in the towel,
walk away from my dreams and visions
take the path of least resistance
and merely exist
just be,
regaling in my memories
like some old worn out fool

the truth is, I can't
no matter the rationalizations
I'll die in this place of complacency
the easy way was never my forte
no matter how hard they plea,
to let go, forget
leave behind and glide
rest on my laurels,
this would surely be the end of me ...

01/30/2008

Posted on 01/30/2008
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