They say the tabloid's main intent
Is "America's gotta know"
Just browse until your heart's content
On rumor, gossip, and ferment.
Enquirer, Star, computer blog
America's gotta know dog
America's gotta know.


The paparazzi soon will ensnare us
As to what bling darling Paris
Will wear from head to toe
America's gotta know. Bro
Americas gotta know


Britney's ranting, Britney's ravin'
She's been really misbehavin'
Is her head's what's only shaven
What do those photographs disclose?


Of course the Star has upped the ante
(I tell you, this is really scanty)
What was the color of her panties?
When dear departed Anna Nichol
Was lowered,…they'll extol
America's gotta know, Bro
America's gotta know


Whose dress is an atrocity?
Or boob job's a monstrosity
Appeases our curiosity
For the golden Oscar show.
Is Paula going homicidal?
Against Simon on the 'Idol'?
Why's this garbage so damn vital?
But America's gotta know, Joe
America's gotta know


We fixate on grills with jewels,
Hollywood druggies, drunks, and fools
While the famous are cavortin'
We somehow miss what's important
As we stare at James brown's casket
We've gone to hell in a wicker basket
And nothin's so sacred you can't ask it
Cause America's gotta know, so
America's gotta know


I suppose what I'm implying
We've got on underlying need for prying
With a brazen impetuosity
To cure all our curiosity
About drivel, garbage, worthless chatter
None of which should really matter
As we read all this 'hear saying'
Our country truly is decaying
That's what America needs to know Bro
America needs to know.

Drive by deaths and parents crying
Crack and meth heads still are buying
A whole new generations dying
In the Baghdad tale of woe.
Politicians keep denying
When they're not, they're plainly lying,
While they're racking in the dough.
They tax our wages, so outrageous,
Like feudal lords of Middle Ages.
And somehow it don't enrage us.
Our Congress has prostituted,
Till their integrity's polluted.
And special interest has intruded
Until the voter's been excluded.
Our leadership's a ship of fools,
Can't stop a war with men and tools,
While killing off our future's pool.
Our leaders preach, "Use lesser means"
Yet drive chauffeured limousines,
Then have the gall and have the gumption
To lecture us on fuel consumption.

Now perverts hang like feasting ghouls
Around our kids on streets, in schools.
Child abuse and molestation's
Become a curse upon this nation.
Our School Boards let it come to pass,
The Holy word not spoke in class.
They've removed, still crucifying
The man who came here glorifying
He's who America need to know, bro
Who America needs to know….

And I don't have the answer
For this swiftly spreading cancer,
That I wish we could outgrow.
But we're reaping what we've sewed.
Of course we'll just "bare and grin" it
Survivor starts in just a minute.
I gotta see the final of that show.
So pardon all my 'Gloom and Doomin'
And I apologize for all my fumin'
You see, I'm just an ordinary human.


Out of all this comes one lesson,
We need to lift our eyes, professin'
"Jesus love us, this I know
For the Bible tells me so…….."

America needs to know that , my friends
America needs to know………

12/03/2007

Author's Note: My 'tribute' to the market tabloids.....

Posted on 12/03/2007
Copyright © 2025 Fredrich Mohre