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clay feet
by Kristina Woodhillboots caked with
mud sun baked and
sloughing at my door
these soles askance
at my earth dance
there will be
more as I slog through
thick clay sticking like bread
dough lift feet or pay
fused firm in concrete
if dried - must keep beat
heels push toward
home tired legs dragÂ…pull
up from the slag hill
boots reach
the Loam
11/09/2006 Posted on 11/09/2006
Copyright © 2024 Kristina Woodhill
| Member Comments on this Poem |
| Posted by Gregory O'Neill on 11/09/06 at 07:07 PM Hi Kristina. I like this form with its staggared rhymes. Yes, the boots feel heavy and the going arduous...till the loam. Nice write! |
| Posted by Charles E Minshall on 11/10/06 at 06:12 AM Hmmmmm dancing with clay. Fun......Charlie |
| Posted by Gabriel Ricard on 11/11/06 at 12:09 AM Clay's good. Heh. As is this piece. Nicely done. |
| Posted by Quentin S Clingerman on 11/11/06 at 03:00 AM Dramatic symbolism of getting through a day. However, the clay sticking to the soles of boots sounds like South Carolina! LOL!! |
| Posted by Michelle Angelini on 11/11/06 at 06:53 PM I saw something different in your words than the guys did. There's struggle to get from one place to another emotionally, with the different kinds of soil representing the way the narrator feels at any given point. Words like "sloughing," "slog," "tired," and "slag hill," give the clues as to the narrator's feelings. The mud and clay are heavy, holding the narrator back, whereas the loam is rich soil, full of the earth's nutrients allowing easier movement - freedom to the desired place. Yes, it has a light touch to the rhythm, but underneath it is another layer. I like the correlation between dirt and emotional transformation.
~Chelle~ |
| Posted by Kathleen Wilson on 11/11/06 at 11:51 PM Delightfully rhythmic, and suggestive with lots of interesting word play! References to cake and baked (if I knew you were coming?) (giggle) even suggest mud pies...such a childish earthiness. Also reminiscent of Van Goh's boot painting, and Charlie Chalin eating his shoes... "sloughing" is such a wonderful word here--- so that is what we do when shoes come off (especially such as these)?-- "these soles askance at my earth dance"
a lovely construction and suggestive of souls... and "bread dough lift feet or pay" another delicious word play--the dough and pay linking up as wellas the "sticky" dough of which bread is made... you eve have "beat" in there to add to the cooking theme... and "keep beat" harks back to the "earth dance" too. The baking of bread, a dance, the creation of a mold, the making it home... (the most nutricious, rich loam) so much packed into this clay of which beauty is made!
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| Posted by Tony Young on 11/13/06 at 07:17 AM I see the many different facial expressions in ones struggle here and on reaching the loam, you'd just love to sling those boots...But know you'll need them tomorrow. Excellent piece Kristina |
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