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Apothecary, You

by Rachelle Howe

Your words are poison,
Wormtongued and slithering
down my
eardrums which erupt
when the acid pools.

Your eyes are vipers,
they hiss your aim and I am
overwrought by your viciousness.
Your intentions, those devils,
devour deliciously,
devour the decadent moments
where you move and make and tremble,
tremendous.

You have been shaken
in the smooth substance
of my rebuttals
for you cannot
will not
have not lied yet, but
if you dare
those tongues of yours
will be hogtied
and severed.

11/05/2006

Author's Note: Poetry assignment #2 -- Thanks, Mr. Coffman. You rock muh socks.

Posted on 11/05/2006
Copyright © 2024 Rachelle Howe

Member Comments on this Poem
Posted by Chris Sorrenti on 11/05/06 at 05:32 PM

Excellent. Doesn't read like an assignment, but straight from the heart.

Posted by Quentin S Clingerman on 11/05/06 at 08:32 PM

Vituperatively vital! Who is the victim? Perhaps deserving such "tongue" lashing! Reading it made me want to say, "Ouch!" Cwertainly startling. Effective use of alliteration.

Posted by Kristine Briese on 11/05/06 at 08:49 PM

As good as your poems always are, or maybe better. I can count on you for vivid, startling images. Hurray!

Posted by Genevieve Sturrock on 11/05/06 at 11:22 PM

"Your words are like poison, Wormtongued and slithering down my eardrums which burst when the acid pools." An excellent portrayal of the damage lies can do! Very well done.

Posted by Leslie Ann Eisenberg on 11/07/06 at 06:25 AM

this strikes, bites, tears at flesh with its unforgiving sounds. LOVE the consonance, and the fab visuals. an assignment? wow, impressive. daring. courageous! whatever you're doing, keep on, sister! love it! PK

Posted by Therese Elaine on 11/07/06 at 10:32 PM

This too, is extremely blatant but it strikes that unforgiving chord which I love -no holds barred indeed!!!

Posted by Anita Mac on 11/07/06 at 11:03 PM

You're words and phrasing are wonderful to read. And the relationship... There's something captivating about ones like this. LOVE it!

Posted by Don Coffman on 11/09/06 at 02:15 PM

Oooh, I'm thoroughly stunned. Excellent ending, seems to fit you so well to imagine such a wormtongued, vicious thing ultimately at your mercy. :D ...and flipping to good lil Pathetic member critique-suggestion mode: "down my eardrums" -> "to my eardrums" and maybe "burst" -> "collapse". I'm a fan of trying to keep 'like' out of metaphors(for some reason): "Your eyes are vipers". Um... wow, well there are my pitiful suggestions. I'll go back to feeling uncreative and stunned now!

Posted by Gabriel Ricard on 11/14/06 at 05:37 AM

i don't think you've ever treated an assignment as anything but a chance to kick some more ass. good stuff.

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