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trying to make amends with you is like talking to god
by Vere Mantratriad
I could
tear my hair
out at its
seams and cry
over spilled
semen on
borrowed sheets
until I'm
blue in the
face, as blue
as your family
jewels of wisdom
that you flaunted
so effortlessly
every time I
misstepped on a
word that I
should have kept
in my head that
dribbled out of
the corner of my
mouth too full
from gagging on
your ego manifest
and I could
spit out every
time but I held
it in because I
was just a stupid
girl with a plan
to find an actual
man whose back
was made of more
than an arch so
I sit here in a
puddle of the mess
you wouldn't sleep
in and now I try
to get through to
you with a different
part of my head
but
you're not even
listening
are you?
07/17/2006 Author's Note: I told him
I liked him when he wasn't such a dick
and I wished I could get inside his head
to read his mind...
but all he heard was
I liked his dick
and I wished I could give him head
that would blow his mind.
Posted on 07/18/2006
Copyright © 2025 Vere Mantratriad
| Member Comments on this Poem |
| Posted by Richard Paez on 07/18/06 at 04:22 AM Good, strong poem here--it approaches the line of being too strong emotionally, but the syntactic slide on almost every line break keeps the punches fresh; it never degenerates, the momentum keeps building up just like a good poem (and good sex) should. There are a couple of instances ("cry/ over spilled/ semen" and the "blue in the face"/"blue as your family/ jewels") that make particularly good use of expected cliches turned over into ironic commentaries by syntactic slide.
Thanks for sharing this. I hope your well of inspiration never runs dry.
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| Posted by Philip F De Pinto on 07/21/06 at 11:12 AM this poem is incredibly rich in sarcasm's tone and irony, and is perfectly executed in form and wit. |
| Posted by Junemarie Roldan on 07/23/06 at 04:52 AM Vere, there you go again, turning everyone on their head as usual. You're so amazing, you're incredible.
I sit like an acolyte, at the feet of the master. Gorgeously writen.
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| Posted by Maria Terezia Ferencz on 07/23/06 at 10:26 PM Awesome write! Boy have I been down this path, and I do not miss it at all....
cocks come easy...(pardon the pun)
it is the mind that comes hard! |
| Posted by Wendy Geal on 07/24/06 at 02:02 AM This is brilliant! All of it.. I've never read you before... you're good. I'm off to read more :) |
| Posted by Bet Yeldem on 08/07/06 at 01:42 AM I find myself returning and returning to your library and folders... soaking it in... loving your writes. |
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