Pathetic.org  
 

a sigh like helium

by Elizabeth Jill


my youngness
today
is an apology
for being
so old in my youth

oh
how
eyes
shift
when life insists itself
upon worn-out doors


04/23/2006

Author's Note: as I like helium

Posted on 04/23/2006
Copyright © 2024 Elizabeth Jill

Member Comments on this Poem
Posted by Christel Crews on 04/23/06 at 07:23 PM

this is beautiful! the first few lines warm my heart...

Posted by Joan Serratelli on 04/23/06 at 08:39 PM

I love this. I absolutely agree with Christel on the first few lines. I also love it because it's very visually appealing. Excellent job!

Posted by Gregory O'Neill on 04/23/06 at 10:06 PM

Hi Jill. Great poetics. Certainly strong enough to stand without the artwork, yet similarly enhanced.

Posted by Ashok Sharda on 04/25/06 at 02:14 PM

How can one be old when one lives from moment to moment and dies from moment to moment? How can one claim to LIVE when one lives in the projections of the life which is dead? One can only LIVE in LIVING, burying one's dead, in continuity, in the moment which is eternal. How does one grow old when one IS, ever present?

Posted by Rula Shin on 04/27/06 at 02:26 PM

Oh my! You used that sensation of "rising helium" and I didn't even realize! I am blind haha Well this has a feeling as though it were written without ever having to put eraser to paper, it flows and floats like the sigh it represents, and yet it reveals the heaviness of thoughts that chain us to past & future, never letting us walk with the time. Yes, it's that heaviness that is lifted with the sigh, though nothing really gets any lighter in light of doors worn out by our own minds. Beautifully written minimal Elizabeth, the dualism you create is so effective, I feel both light as a feather, and heavy as a stone.

Posted by JD Clay on 04/28/06 at 02:21 AM

It's not the dichotomy at work here that gets me but the paradox at play.
pe4ce...

Posted by Michael Faraday on 04/28/06 at 05:00 PM

coolio! :)

Posted by Philip F De Pinto on 04/29/06 at 12:30 PM

this poem is delicious to the core and I would say more saving I'm busy chewing.

Posted by Vere Mantratriad on 05/06/06 at 06:24 PM

Simple and absolutely stunning write.

Posted by Mary Ellen Smith on 05/12/06 at 04:59 AM

this poem has so much texture to it...you can almost touch the feelings that it creates in the reader.

Posted by Charles E Minshall on 08/20/10 at 12:17 AM

I would like to have youngness today. Good poem.....CharMin

Return to the Previous Page
 

pathetic.org Version 7.3.2 May 2004 Terms and Conditions of Use 0 member(s) and 2 visitor(s) online
All works Copyright © 2024 their respective authors. Page Generated In 0 Second(s)