Vacant blood smile by Sam RobertsDisembodied voices weep from the last bar scene,
Connected to a cigarette, the girl sits quietly
Her gaze is vacant; killing smiles of blood
While the cold and decayed butt rolls around the ash, playfully
And in her last breath, she exhales submissively
She is always lost, stumbling up the smoke wall.
The moonchildren howl, and she stays still with dusk
He sits by the window, waiting for the protest
Voices that wont wilt, dont lie
And her coma doesnt dream 05/05/2005 Author's Note: all messy :(
It was a subconcious effort to write and it turned out more relevant than i thought. I do that all the time, it freaks me out. SB x
Posted on 05/05/2005 Copyright © 2024 Sam Roberts
Member Comments on this Poem |
Posted by Charlie Morgan on 05/05/05 at 06:01 PM ...sam...you are right in your projection of what we do...sometimes we don't even know...sorta like fish askin' what WATER is...it's all around them...so we/you/poets/writers...let go a string of words and ... and... in this one your note says messy...but i read it about three times, and if i read it line by LINE and connect the dots later, it is so heavy...reading each line in my poems are like that so when i started doing this one that way-WOW ...there is a World of Stuff being talked about, referenced, etc...so sam, out of chaos comes symetry...i love this rather thoughtful piece...peace, chaz |
Posted by Michelle Angelini on 05/07/05 at 12:04 AM Sam, I agree with Charlie. There's a lot in this poem that beneath the surface. The words say one thing, but the emotions the words represent are quite powerful. I do the same thing when I write, mainly because I let my muse guide my writing. She does a great job - so did you! If I had to critique my work, I'd always rate it lower than someone else does. Maybe it's natural to second guess our talent, but it shouldn't be. ;-)
~Chelle~ |
Posted by Deborah Breuer on 10/11/06 at 10:47 PM Great write...good imagery and tone. |
Posted by Kristina Woodhill on 12/06/12 at 03:13 PM I was glad the latest POTD pointed me to your library. You have a unique way with words and ideas that I am enjoying very much. |
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