One day by Richard Trotter One day i fell in your ocean gripped by the whirlpool i made, when the world is torn and flowing I gasp the dampest serenade- reduced with each look and thought Angel, will your sweetness fade? One day I gazed at the twilight, the last light played on your face, I held your warm and absent hand but sat alone in the darkest place, where flowers bloom around me but cut me so far from your grace. x x 03/03/2005 Posted on 03/03/2005 Copyright © 2024 Richard Trotter Member Comments on this Poem Posted by Charlie Morgan on 03/03/05 at 10:21 PM ...poignant, gripping...love the metahors here, 'your ocean ,,, whirlpool that i made ,,, warm and absent hand' ... it's rich all over richard...peace, chaz Posted by Michele Schottelkorb on 03/03/05 at 10:27 PM richard, this is so beautifully sad... it tastes of your unique flair for sad love poetry... excellent write... blessings... Posted by Melissa Arel on 03/04/05 at 02:33 PM One of your best I think :) Beautifully rendered, Richard.. great job :) Posted by Stephanie Kent on 03/05/05 at 12:41 AM That second stanza is exquisite...there is such brevity in those little captured moments; they say so much. "absent hand"...amazing. Posted by Megan Langley on 03/05/05 at 03:37 AM I absolutely love everything about this poem... the imagery, the rhyming, just everything! and I'm sooooo estatic to see that you are still writing poetry ;) xoxo much love ~megan Return to the Previous Page   pathetic.org Version 7.3.2 May 2004 Terms and Conditions of Use 0 member(s) and 2 visitor(s) online All works Copyright © 2024 their respective authors. Page Generated In 0 Second(s)