Home    

Tides

by Heide McAlister-Bates


We went to the seaside this weekend –
Not at all like the one you loved so much,
but there was a beach, and the sea stretched out past
the point of seeing anything but a hazy
horizon, just like it did at Winchester Bay
when I was small and secure and
you were very much alive.

I remember watching you, standing on the deck
of the Paiute and turning to wave, saying
“Wish me luck” as the boat pulled away from the dock.
You were only gone for a few hours, but it seemed an eternity to me. I sat on the dock and watched for
the small speck that would carry you back to me
grow larger and larger until you were just next
to me, and the mooring lines were thrown to young,
fit boys and you bounded from the deck, smiling
from ear to ear,showing off your catch – you limited
out every time. It was as if the sea wanted to share
her bounty with you, because
you loved her so much.

Your curls would whip in the wind, tangling around the headscarf that was de rigeur for deep-sea fishing and
late 1960’s housewife.(I had my own miniature version, wanted to be just like you.) We’d walk the beach after
your catch was cleaned and weighed and put on ice –
your time to yourself was over,
now it was time for us.

You would sit on a piece of driftwood, smoking and
watching the waves and me, in turn. The waves rolled
in and out with comforting regularity.
Did you know then that I would also roll in and out
of your life with a similar regularity? That we would have closeness and distance, love and hate, patience and frustration, ebb and flow? That despite all of that,
we were like that ocean –
constant and eternal?

I walked on the beach with my daughter last Sunday,
and I think that yes, you knew, all of that and more.
You were there with us, too, in the sun and the rain
and in the wind that whipped my curls around the hood
of the jacket that is de rigeur for a woman in 2004
walking on a beach
with
tears
in
her
eyes.

08/29/2004

Author's Note: Memories of my mom, on the first anniversary of her passing. She loved the ocean, and like her, I find serenity there.

Posted on 08/31/2004
Copyright © 2024 Heide McAlister-Bates

Member Comments on this Poem
Posted by Maureen Glaude on 10/01/04 at 07:27 PM

this gives me, as both a mom and daughter, (with a poem about her mom and the sea, at Maine, on here) tears for sure. Beautiful. Blessings. What a circle, though too soon completed...but on-going too, in spirit for sure.

Posted by Chris Sorrenti on 10/09/04 at 01:32 PM

Captivating read Heide; a subtle sadness beautifully expressed throughout. Your descriptiveness easily allows the reader to be right in the picture with you. Thanks also for your comment on That Special Toy.

Posted by Stephanie Kent on 01/05/05 at 04:30 AM

So poignant, and so real...

Posted by Oliver Drewman on 02/20/05 at 02:57 PM

Moving piece

Posted by Rachelle Howe on 08/16/06 at 03:57 PM

yeah, you can feel that longing peace in the tempo. ironcially, the speed of the piece is like the waves, gently hitting the shore of meaning. not to be gaggingly cliche. my crit though is the line breaks in a couple of places. other than, i'll have to read again.

Return to the Previous Page
 

pathetic.org Version 7.3.2 May 2004 Terms and Conditions of Use 0 member(s) and 2 visitor(s) online
All works Copyright © 2024 their respective authors. Page Generated In 0 Second(s)