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Life 101
by Heide McAlister-Bates
When I take stock of my Life, as one does periodically,
I find myself wishing for reference material.
I remember the threats from the powers that were
when I was a child
This will go on your Permanent Record, young lady
Where is it?
Who has it?
Im no longer that young lady
time is passing,
and my chance to see it
may be passing, too.
Too much has passed, so much unwritten by my own hand.
I need to know who has it, so I can read, reflect.
I need to see the snapshots of Smiles and Grimaces of tears of Joy,
tears of Pain.
I need to see the video footage of the sleepless nights, waiting, worrying
wondering why.
I need to peruse the columns of Achievements and Pipe Dreams
Successes and Failures,
Victories and Defeats.
I need to hear the recordings
of the audible screams of
Passion and Anger;
the silent screams of Frustration.
Oh, it will take so long
To finish the study
of a lifetime.
But I need to make sense of it all.
I need to know
why I am
who I am
what Ive become
what I will become
and
when.
03/31/2004 Author's Note: After a long hiatus, I'm back.
Posted on 03/31/2004
Copyright © 2024 Heide McAlister-Bates
| Member Comments on this Poem |
| Posted by Ashok Sharda on 03/31/04 at 02:53 PM Well, one is always one's INTENDING SELF, the self one wants to become. The self , the composer of this beautiful questioning piece, the self who 'need to make sense of it all'. |
| Posted by Charles E Minshall on 04/19/04 at 03:22 AM I like this a lot Heidi. I don't think if there is a permanent record around of my earlier years
that I would like to read it. I would not like reading of my early failures.....Charlie |
| Posted by Glenn Currier on 04/21/04 at 03:17 AM Your honesty and straight forward style gripped me and made me wonder what such a record would reveal for/about me. I think I would rather forget. Thanks for great poem. |
| Posted by Joan Serratelli on 03/05/09 at 06:44 PM I'm glad there's no permanent record for me! I loved the last stanza- it relly made think. Great write- I really enjoyed this. |
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