{ pathetic.org }
 

i can see

by Michele Schottelkorb

this confusion is spinning me
halting me, I cannot see
 
this violation is catching me
throwing me, I cannot see
 
this pain is quickening me
deadening me, I cannot see
 
this world is beating me
healing me... I can see

10/03/2003

Author's Note: i would like to add more stanzas in the future...

Posted on 10/03/2003
Copyright © 2024 Michele Schottelkorb

Member Comments on this Poem
Posted by Chris Sorrenti on 10/03/03 at 01:11 PM

Neat literary reflection of how the world brings us full circle; no choice but to take the bad with the good.

Posted by Ashok Sharda on 10/03/03 at 02:17 PM

Yes, SEEING what is, rather than imposing what is. And SEEING the positive aspect of life, rather the life it self, as it IS. More stanzas, you shall.

Posted by Max Bouillet on 10/04/03 at 03:25 PM

This is an excellent verse that details how our perceptions alter the way we "see" the world. Great read.

Posted by Quentin S Clingerman on 10/06/03 at 12:51 AM

Strong imagery through out. Intriguing theme. I think it needs a couple of transitional stanzas before the last line. Though powerful they seem abruptly placed.

Posted by Don Coffman on 10/07/03 at 07:38 PM

More stanzas would certainly round it out a little, but it's strong and ponderous as it is. I think of it as improving and strengthening to the toils of life. Very nifty poem.

Return to the Previous Page
 

pathetic.org Version 7.3.2 May 2004 Terms and Conditions of Use 0 member(s) and 2 visitor(s) online
All works Copyright © 2024 their respective authors. Page Generated In 0 Second(s)