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Rainy Day Visions
by Amanda L Marronrain pounds the roof
as i sit here and write
i close my eyes and
i'm greeted by visions
visions of you
your laugh
your smile
your face
your eyes
i remember the way you walk
the beat as each
of your feet
hits the pavement
the way your body flowed
so fluidly with each step
i remember you shirtless
in your baggy jeans and your timbs
and how much excitement that picture still brings me
i remember you standing in front of me
forbidding me to pass
until i told you what was wrong
i'm hanging on to these memories
i'm reaching out
but you're gone
07/13/2003 Posted on 07/13/2003
Copyright © 2024 Amanda L Marron
| Member Comments on this Poem |
| Posted by Agnes Eva on 07/13/03 at 05:10 PM nice fusion of "missing someone" images and the fall of the rain |
| Posted by Melanie A Bennett on 07/26/04 at 02:10 AM I like this...It reminds me of my sweetie who now lives about 6 hours away from me. Nice work. :) |
| Posted by Richard Paez on 09/08/04 at 09:30 PM Agnes said it well--you make the transition from falling rain to your subject very fluidly, and use great tricks (like the rhythm and the drop-like repetition of "your") to keep the image of rain vivid throughout. My favorite aspect about this is how you describe him so well--not in the physical sense so that I could picture him, but the little things that really matter. You can tell "how much excitement that picture still brings" you, and how strong your feelings are. Very nice, I like this one a lot. |
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