where was i with all my masculine playthings?
and what was my place if not outside?
losing a part of myself;
slowly blurring myself undone.
he burned the edges of my thoughts
but i was the one who let him do it.
i never thought it was right,
but how could i say it was wrong?
it was a perfect pain
in an imperfect way.

i broke myself into little pieces
time and time again
but i was never ashamed;
never knew i should've been.

and now, i dont know how to feel;
As i slowly start to feel the pain seethe.
but he made me aware of universal
love; crude as the introduction was.
i have been raped
of reasoning.

05/29/2003

Author's Note: first draft, 5/29/03the beginnings of a poem; not nearly complete. second draft, 5/29/03 added 2 stanzas, changed the language in the first few lines.

Posted on 05/29/2003
Copyright © 2025 Andrew S Adams