unwritten haiku by Emily G Myersthe dark arms of him
naturally encircle
an unpossessed waist
angry branches sway
a memory of your face
step away from him
unrequited love
but there's nothing I can do
step away from him
down the road we walk
I can see you in my dreams
only you matter
a sweet dream of you
I prefer to his presence
find me lost in sleep
02/24/2003 Author's Note: I don't usually do the whole "poetic form" thing... but the first one came to me and I submitted to the urge and made it a sort of series. These may have been the first haiku I've ever written... I don't recall any others. Feedback would be wonderful so I know whether to continue with the structured form or head back ashamedly to free verse. :)
*So I revised the first haiku... the second line was "wrap naturally around"... maybe it makes no difference, but I thought "encircle" was prettier. Oh the vanity. Should I change it back? Eeek.
Posted on 02/24/2003 Copyright © 2025 Emily G Myers
Member Comments on this Poem |
Posted by Chris Sorrenti on 02/25/03 at 12:09 AM A worthy collection of romantic haikus. I like how you've kept to the discipline of 5-7-5. The conflict/tension between you and two other parties clear. |
Posted by Chris Sorrenti on 02/27/03 at 01:15 AM I like encircle better...more direct, and less syllables. Touche! |
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