in & out

by Richard Paez

in and out
another day of my life recedes
a slow-motion wave slipping
from the shores of my deserted beach

the closest I’ve come to sand
is crumbling concrete-
all my palm trees are halogen
street lights buzzing madly
and the only wildlife here
are the blind crabs shuffling
from the weight of their odd claws

this is the bleakest moment of my life-
waiting here by the horizon
for some fabled corona to replace
all this tasteless moonshine.

could I shave away all these inhibitions
like a good dock-side whittler
and sharpen myself to an effective edge?
cut away the bonds between skin cells
and set my life afloat on these oily waters?

or better yet-
erode them like these waves
and echo nonsense from indiscriminate locations
~ sing drinking songs from a sinking raft ~


Author's Note: 2nd verse, 6th line- which would be more gramatically correct, "is" or "are"?

Posted on 11/23/2002
Copyright © 2024 Richard Paez

Member Comments on this Poem
Posted by Bethany Lee on 11/24/02 at 03:07 PM

my, my, my Richard...i've read a lot of your piece, and i must deem this one my favourite! It flows and meanders its way up my spine..."all my palm trees are halogen" fantastic visual...(makes me yearn for Florida, though...*s*) and "for some fabled corona to replace all this tasteless moonshine." that stopped my breath for a moment with the perfection of the words...mmmmm...such a soulquenching bite of poetry, here...bravo!

Posted by Chris Sorrenti on 11/27/02 at 02:15 PM

Despite this poems's dark side, your choice and arrangement of imagery make it a fun raft ride, Richard. Pass the rum and let's sing to seemingly going nowhere.

Posted by Michele Schottelkorb on 02/04/05 at 08:51 PM

i first actually stopped at line 6 stanza 2, as it caught me off guard... then i re-read it and saw that it is correct as it is... this sent me into a reverie... a dream-like state of introspection... funny, i wondered if your poetry had evolved over time... or was it always this deep and personally relatable (to me, anyway)... it's definitely the latter... blessings...

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