The Journal of Matt Forget Move-in fun
09/12/2004 09:46 p.m.
So we are completely moved into the new place. Though I must say we are far from being completely settled. Right now the living room is full of the office stuff because the offic isn't finished from being painted yet. We have no living room furniture yet but we should have that in about a month. Once the office is done we will have some kinda of living area for at least a couple of chairs to watch tv. The office is what I can't wait to be finished because I kinda need that space to do my homework and reports and things like that. Right now I'm sitting at my desk which is in the middle of the office as my b/f is painting around me. Isn't that fun?
School is going well. I may need to get some extra help in Calculus because this professor is just going way too fast for me. I'm a little rusty on the calc material and would love someone to give me a hand with it. Other than that, my other classes are going just fine. I am currently Cool
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Day 2
09/08/2004 03:24 p.m.
Ok, I'm not going to writing everyday on here but I do have to say that day 2 is going very well. I finished what I think will be my hardest or should I say most challenging class of the semester. He is a very smart guy and definitely knows what he is talking about. The thing is....he wants to make sure that we know what he is talking about and wants to make sure that we know everything he teaches us down to a single copper wire. This man is 2 marbles away from genius level. Unbelievable. I've had this guy before and a C in the class is like an A. That's how challenging it is. But let me tell you, I will walk out of this class just like the other class with him knowing so much more than I did.
My boy is taking the next 4 days off so he can finish up around the house. He rented a truck for Saturday which I can't wait to finally get all my stuff over to the new place. I hate having to be without a computer at home. *You know you are addicted to the computer when you are having withdrawals.* I am forced to start reading books. I guess that's a good thing seeing as though reading is what develops the mind into a broad and creative mind that it is. But otherwise, I just want to be settled.
We will be ordering the living room furniture this weekend too. Olive Green suede material that you sit in and sink. I love it. Can't wait for it to be sitting in the living room.
Ok, gotta jet, even though my next class isn't until 2pm and its only 11:20...oh well....lata peeps :) I am currently Good
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Back in Action
09/07/2004 03:58 p.m.
So today was my first day back at WIT. Oh the fun and enjoyment I had. I ran into one person that I knew...everyone else was a blank to me. All my friends graduated... :( but that's ok...soon I'll be graduating too and I'll be all yay and stuff.
I was up bright and early this morning (5:30am) just to get all ready to get here. I got here and had some breakfast, looked around for people I recognized...which at 7:30 in the morning...most of them wouldn't be around cuz I know they don't get up that early. Then off to my first class. Then off to my second class and I am now finished for the day. 12 noon and I'm done my day already. What do I do with myself? Hmmmm...
So I come on here and post my little journal entry telling everyone I love dearly how my day has gone so far. Oh the fun tomorrow will bring.
The moving situation is well it is....Saturday is the big moving day...even though we are officially sleeping at the new place. I have a ton of stuff still left at the apartment. I just hope the weekend comes quickly so I can just get all this done and over with asap. Scott is still painting and all that fun stuff so we'll see how everything goes as far as where the furniture goes.
So that's what's been up with me. New and improved from yesterday...open and ready for what tomorrow will bring me. I am currently Cool
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The Weekend Period
08/22/2004 01:14 a.m.
It's a temporary thing to sit here and say my life completely sucks. But I can't say that. I have in the past and for some reason things just aren't perfect. I have great friends who are absolutely crazy people but can never have better people as friends. I could name them all but it would take a bit....plus the fact that I know I would most likely forget someone and I would be entirely put on their hate list forever and ever and I don't want that. Friends from school, Douglas, Brockton, NY, East Coast, West Coast, South Coast, Central US, Texas, Watertown, Cambridge, Boston, Mass, Pathetic.org....oh boy do I have to keep going....oh wait....overseas (temporarily...get your ass back here Pete! We miss you!).
Some of my friends have changed my life so much that I can't explain it. We've had our up moments and down moments but not one of them has ever said screw you, we hate you, just die!.....No way would they say that. I have had some huge fights, arguments and annoyances from a lot of them and they all know it, but deep down, I could not get through half of what I got through without any of you around. And for that, not only do I thank you but I really truely care about each and every one of you. Thank you for everything each of you have done and no matter where you go in life I'll always be thinking of you.
So what brings this on? Well for one, I've done some pretty stupid stuff in the last few years and quite honestly I would do anything to just take it all back. But things happen for a reason right? I mean I have a loving boyfriend who just will not let go of me for a moment (which is a good thing). Unfortunately, I met him with other people just disagreeing with the way I went about meeting him. They all know that the past is the past now, we all move forward from there. I'm just glad that even though some of my friends may not be friends with my other friends, the fact is that they are all my friends. I mean I would love it if all my friends were friends with each other but life doesn't work that way. Too bad because that would be a hell of a lot of great friends getting along with one another....ehhh c'est la vie, oui?
I hope the even though I've had some incredibly huge mistakes in my life that completely derailed my life for a bit can forgive me and come back into my life. I miss them greatly and to go back to the great friendships that we once had would be so great to me. But if not, I'm sorry that things had to have happened this way.
To all my friends past and present, you all are great individuals. Strive to be the best person you can be. I believe in all of you and that's the truth. You all have the power to do what you want to be and do. Be real and if you ever make a mistake, pick up the pieces and put yourself back together....it's ok, life is not perfect. We all make stupid choices in our lives sometimes...just remember you're never alone, there's always someone to talk to no matter what.
Ok that's my weekend period......
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Graduation 2004
08/14/2004 07:19 p.m.
You guys made it! I'm so proud of you. I watched as each of you went up those stairs, took your diplomas and walked off. I tried to meet up with as many of you as I could, unfortunately to those I didn't get to meet up with I'm so sorry.
The most important person I wanted to see the most I couldn't find. I saw you on stage. You did an unbelievable job with your speech and I could feel every word you said. You inspire me. I look up to you as a younger brother would. You could say you have two younger brothers looking up to you...hehe....even though you're younger than me, LOL. You are by far the best person who has influenced my life, saved my life and dramatically changed my life. You are the person I want to congratulate the most on always being you. You made it buddy! I'm so happy for you.
To every one of my friends that walked today, Congratulations. We have shared many memories together from "Bullshit" and "Asshole" (card games if anyone didn't know) to sharing together what we could never live without....our dreams. Thank you for being such great friends. I hope we never lose contact with each other. Keep me informed of all you do and never forget the memories. I know I won't.
Good luck guys and remember that nothing will stop you if you keep trying. You have made me proud! I am currently Proud
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My Wishes to My Friends
08/13/2004 06:03 p.m.
Tomorrow will be one of the biggest days of the lives of people who have been a huge part in my life. Graduation is among the most important part of a person's life, not only because they are finished the degree that put them higher in their talents, but they completed a large step that may have been the most difficult step since learning to walk.
My friends have completed these steps. They may have not been the smoothest, cleanest ride to completion but they did it. They have succeeded their challenges and succeeded to the more powerful roads that lay before them. Whether you continue with your education or you have found a job that you would work the rest of your natural careers (or both), you have shown what great power each of you has proven throughout your years at school.
I have lived with and around each of you to know you not as a friend but part of my family. We've stuck together through thick, through thin, bad times and good times. Each of you are your own person and where ever you go and whatever you do, I wish each of you the best of luck in your future endeavors. I'm proud of each of you for making it together. Thank you for being there for me as I will be there for you tomorrow. I love each of you with the dearest of every part of my heart. Good luck, best wishes, don't loose touch or I'll hunt you down and most importantly, Congratulations! You guys deserve it! I am currently Proud
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The Real Deal
07/28/2004 01:35 a.m.
This is an entry that needs to be out in the open now and allow people to understand exactly what is going on. Tell me after this that both my opinion and destruction of personal property are the same.
Back in 2000, I lived with my dad in a small semi-finished room above the garage separated from the main house. It was a cozy place for me to have my space away from the rest of the family. I’m not saying I disliked any of them, just that I like my own space from time to time (and the fact that they all smoked and I really couldn’t deal with that).
So I lived up in this room. I had a lot of personal things up there. A beautiful hand-me-down desk from my grandmother that my grandfather hand built; yearbooks from each year of high school; two sets of prom glasses; paper work/school work from high school; my paper journal, videos of each prom; the class slideshow on tape; my trumpets and various other knick knacks that I had in my room.
After I went off to college, I trusted everyone to leave my stuff alone. During my college years, I was informed that my dad’s girlfriend had been invited to live in the house with him. Along with her, her daughter and her middle son moved in also. Her son, thinking the same as me, really wanted his personal space. So with approval from me to use my room as a getaway, he lived up there. I explained to both him and my dad that when I come back, that my room was mine during my stay.
Now, in less than a year, the room became his and everything in it was in his possession. By that time, I was down at the Cape, working for my aunt during the summer. I had bought a computer and was using that for a long time. By the end of the summer, my aunt, as my work bonus bought me a brand new computer. I brought the new computer to school with me and brought the other computer back to my dad’s house to put in the room. At that time, the middle son and I had a decent liking to each other. So I told him that he can use my computer for his school work only and that he needs to take excellent care of it because I was still paying it off. He said ok and that was said and done.
One year later, I came home to visit and was told by my dad not to go up to the room because it was a mess. Well, they still to this day (they will after they read this)never knew that I did go up there that day. Yes, it was a mess, but I also noticed many things that not one person in that household would be honest and tell me what actually happened. I found my computer broken and thrown in a corner, my prom glasses wrecked, my collectables gone, paper journal ripped up and drawn in and read, my desk wrecked (drawers broken, holes in the top of it), my trumpet missing. All this I saw that day. All this and nothing but anger filled my head….my whole body even. I cried and cried. What do I say? What do I do? I just left. I couldn’t deal with it.
A week later, I asked my dad if I could get my stuff. I asked him for my computer because I was going to use it at school. I wanted to see what he would say to me. He said that he would have it ready for me. He never said anything about it being broken at all. So I knew right there he was hiding something from me and not telling me the truth about the situation. So I took him for his word and made it down to the house to find out that he never had any of my stuff ready for me to pick up. Now I mentioned more than just the computer. I told him that I wanted my desk, my books, my trumpet, and other things of mine. He told me flat out that he would have it ready for me and it never happened. I told him I would be back for it and he once again told me he would have it ready. That day never came. I managed to have him pull out my desk for me and that day found out what the desk looked like and pointed out to him what happened to it. He never said a word. A shrug of the shoulders and it was out of his head. I picked up the desk and left with nothing else because he never had it out. I left in anger.
I continued to pester him about my stuff. He told me that he was busy and never had a chance to get it out. But he did tell me when he had time that he would. He never kept me up to date as to if he managed to get to it, nor did he ever tell me about it being broken or anything being destroyed.
As of today, I don’t know the condition of anything over in that room. The only thing I have in my possession is my desk, which I had to replace 2 drawers and in the process of sanding and refinishing the desk completely because of all the holes, marks, large incisions in the desk that were never there when I left to go to school.
I never said or did anything to her son. The most I ever did was let him use my room to get away from the stresses of the house, let him use my computer for his school work. I thought I could trust him. I thought since he was entering my family, I could put my faith in him. He was 15 years old when he did this. Old enough to realize what personal possession is. Old enough to know what is right and what is wrong.
I have a right to be angry at him for this. I do dislike him for his attitude regarding this situation. I do dislike him for his dishonesty, for his disrespect. I am angry at my dad for not stepping up and taking care of this matter and apologizing for what had happened, replacing what could be replaced; pulling something together that could somehow repay the damage that this son had done. Nothing was ever done, said or thought of by anyone in that house. To this day, I still am not in the wrong or at fault for disliking that son for what he has done. To this day, I am not in the wrong for being upset for my dad for not taking matters into his hands the way he should have in returning my things or taking a step to resolve this issue in replacing or somehow repaying me for what has been destroyed. If this son was that immature, it is definitely someone’s responsibility for his actions and someone has to step up and take what needs to be said to them.
The journal entry that was posted 2 days ago expressed my true feelings of the wedding that took place with my father and his love. I have no problem with them getting married. I never did and never will. I think the wedding was absolutely beautiful. But my feelings for her boys and how they have treated me will never change. They have hurt me in ways that can never be changed. I’ve never ever been so displaced in a family that no one would take this matter seriously enough to make things better.
Disrespecting me and my belongings is not a “walk away” matter. This is a very serious issue that happened and I believe that this was not my fault. I never deserved this. I never asked for anything to be moved, destroyed, and handled improperly. I never even received an apology. That hurts the most.
For my family telling me it wasn’t right to write my true and honest feelings about the wedding and the outcome of what happened has no balance of what has happened in my life. I know that people have seen what they really were like at that wedding. I know how to act in a church, baseball caps should not be worn in a church period never mind for a wedding. For what I said in that journal entry is a right of free speech. No names were mentioned, the world isn’t going to change because of the entry at all.
If people are upset about me because of the one thing I said, you really have to step back and look at all the negative things that have happened to me with them. Physical things. No word, whether truth or fake would ever compare to the destruction of my personal property or my well being.
My life will go on. Yes, I may have lost priceless possessions but it will go on. My anger for them will always be there. I will never forgive someone who has done wrong to me and never would admit to it. I would never say sorry for something I have never done wrong in the first place.
This is what I see is right. This is how it will stay. I am an adult. I know my responsibilities. I know the difference between wrong and right. And I definitely know the value of respect and how much impact it has on the affect of a person’s well being.
I thank everyone that took the time to read through this. Members of the site, if you wish to leave a comment and place your opinion, it would be greatly appreciated. Outside readers, I really hope you understand my position here. Those of you, you know who you are, who disagree with my wedding journal entry, I really hope this has helped you understand why I am angry and upset at those boys. I wish my dad the best with his wife and may you live long and prosperous together. I’m happy for the both of you.
Thank you.
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To my friends here at Pathetic.org
07/27/2004 11:09 p.m.
Unfortunately, I can't tell you about my life anymore because I got spoken to by my family who seems quite upset about my last journal entry. So I apologize for my recent journal entry and will, from now on, leave the information that makes my life the way it is out of the picture completely.
Am I sorry for my feelings? Not really, because they are not sorry for destroying my property, no matter how old they are. I was 15 once and I know respect for other people's personal property. I am sorry for writing it on here, which I should not have done. I leave this journal spoken for. I am currently Angry
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Said and Done
07/25/2004 04:42 p.m.
So I made it through the wedding. The wierd thing is I am not upset at the fact that I actually went. For being the oldest out of now 7 kids total, I was the one that really kept it all together. Her kids were awful (granted the older one pushed and made it through without hassle), but they just didn't have any enthusiasm, they were upset that she was getting married to my dad, and I was just waiting for one of them to try and ruin the whole thing. I felt so bad about it all. So my outlook on the whole thing turned around. I was there with them as much as I could be, giving them the support that I could.
They had an unbelievable wedding. She was so beautiful and my dad was looking sharp. The little kids were adorable. My little bro was in a tux and step sis was in a dress (ring barer and flower girl). It was so cute. My sister brought my nephew. He was adorable. He clung to me a lot of the reception. Her boyfriend was a nice guy too. It was amazing to see how much he just kept on talking to me. It was like a non-stop friend going on and on about everything to nothing. It was an interesting evening. And yes I danced. I danced several fast and slow dances. But not to worry, my baby will always be my life. No girl will ever take him away from me. He's mine and none of you can have him! So there!
Yeah, so all and all things went well. Now I'm back home and about ready to go to work. Man I hate this job. Oh well. Until next time.... I am currently Cool
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Night Out
07/18/2004 01:43 p.m.
All I have to say from last night is holy crap! Saturday night and we decided to go out to our regular club and heard that a few people from work decided to go as well. We said cool and hoped to see them there. Now keep in mind this is a mostly gay club and these guys were mostly straight.
So the night starts off slow. People arrived kinda lateish (around 1130 or so). Two of our friends were showing up that we work with pretty directly. They are nice ladies who know how to have a good time. So they finally arrive and we are just getting a couple of drinks to relax ourselves before going to dance. The hostess drag queen was in the room and one of the girls goes up to her and starts having this conversation. Amusing as hell, especially when they start talking about her fake breasts and stuff. They are feeling them and all that and all we can do is crack up laughing.
That is over in no time and we are in the dance room just having fun. Dancing, singing and enjoying the night. The first drag dance comes on and we are just standing watching. After that we had another drink and just talked and danced.
About 1am came around and the girl that felt the drag queens breasts was out of it. She was picking an arguement with a young gay guy couple because she wanted to dance on the box and they were "hogging" it. Figures that there has to be some sort of dispute where we have to jump in the middle of it. Hysterical tho. So we fix that issue quickly and the drag queen comes back on to inform us that the second show never showed up. So she goes to put on her own show by somehow devowering a seafood salad sub on the dance floor (but in the messy way). She's throwing food all over the place and smearing it all over herself. The end of it all she picks some random person out of the crowd and kisses them with her make up face with seafood salad all over it. Yeah...who was that lucky random person???? Yeah, ME! Damnit I had seafood all over me. It was so friggin funny. I smelled like crab for the rest of the night. It was completely disgusting but utterly laughing my ass off experience. As soon as everyone from work saw that, they all ran away but they were dying with laughter.
The rest of the night was pretty much quiet after that. The night ended with a happy note and everyone went home to sleep. Great night! Definitely going down in the memory books. I am currently Upbeat
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