I failed at keeping things still
And woke such beastly needs.
I have always wanted to try again.
Take all the darkness in hand,
My fingers wringing the night
Of its juices until the thirsts quiet.

And so I beckon this beast to quiet,
Not to fight or rear up, just to lie still
For one more dream-plagued night.
I shake in the warmth of its needs,
Make attempts to nourish by hand,
But dance narrowly around fangs again.

This dark feeding will go on. Again,
In this blanket cocoon, I am quiet.
Lying on my side, baring only a hand
over the edge, flushed and fingers still,
I stare out at the room. My own needs
seem so much greater in the night.

A silent shout and I wake from such a night
terror. The thirst is aching inside again.
Though terrified, I know what it needs
Is not out of reach and will not sit in quiet.
I am but panicked and caught in a net, still
breathing is labored and I reach for a hand.

In dreams now, the beast extends its hand,
Inviting me to follow into the labyrinth night.
The ground shudders below, but I am still
Stuck fast behind this gazing desire. Again,
Air is heavy with the tangible quiet.
I have now forgotten the ache of my needs.

I am sleeping but awake with constant needs -
Treading blindly, arms out for a steady hand
to grab my own. I scream in the quiet
of my closed eyes, wrapped tightly in the night.
A slave to the creature inside my brain, again
The fight rages on to reach some kind of still.

I know only to keep still, longing to fulfill my needs.
Dancing with a beast again, shoulder to shoulder, hand
Wrapped tightly around the night. We must remain quiet.

07/18/2011

Author's Note: A sestina. First Draft.

Posted on 07/18/2011
Copyright © 2024 Meghan Helmich