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What Was Her Name?

by Eric Seligmann

(Spoken)
Let me tell you about my last relationship
I was with this girl for a couple of years
Everything was going alright...
I tried to be a nice guy
Took her out a bunch
Tried to impress her
Spent a bunch of money

Then one day she comes to me and says...
"You know, Eric, there is something missing from our relationship."
Something missing, huh?
Wouldn't happen to be the money, now would it?
She says, "No. I am just not in love with you anymore."

"But I still wanna be friends, though." She says.
Friends, huh? What the hell are friends, anyway?
It means you can come over, ya know?
Four or five days out of the month
Use me as some kind of emotional tampon?
Yeah, thats exactly what I need!

It also means, we don't fuck right?
She says, "Yeah, we don't fuck."
Well, I took all my anger
All my emotion and everything I wanted to say
And put it into a little song
It kinda goes like this...

(Sung)

You're a fucking whore
You used me
You never loved me
You never loved me
I hope you slide underneath a truck
And taste that taste of your own fucking blood

Die
Why won't you die
I want you to die
and will you please die?

I want my records back
I want my life back
I want my wasted time back
I want my money back

(Spoken)

I know a lot of the guys out there
Have that special girl
Who emotionally raped you
Ripped you apart
Financially fucked you
And even broke your heart
Now do me a favor
There is no shame
Shout it out at the top of your lungs
What was her name?

02/19/2011

Author's Note: Probably the only "cover" song I do, its an adaptation for guitar with a second guitar part and a lot more stuff added in of Sam Kinison's "Love Song" from the 80's. Rock on Sam... I usually add a personal touch from my own personal experience...recorded the song and sent it to the ex for her birthday because I am an evil bastard like that. But hey, everyone gets over their heartbreaks differently. I choose not to cry about it, and sing about it and immortalize the rotten, cheating, girl... :-)

Posted on 02/19/2011
Copyright © 2021 Eric Seligmann

Member Comments on this Poem
Posted by Charlie Morgan on 02/21/11 at 11:26 PM

...they'll be by soon; meanwhile drink plenty of liquids and rest. maybe even a cold comress atop ye fore'ad. you absolutely kicked my butt with this one. i was rocking on mecouch. can't brag enuff! [reminds me of a joke about...

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