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TERMITES

by Steven Craig



The ICE PRINCE was a freighter.
That carried cut wood.
From the north.
To the south.

The ICE PRINCE sank in the English Channel.
It was carrying thousands of tons.
Of sawn timber boards 30 feet long.
To Greece.
All its load of wood was washed up on the English coast.
Piles of 30 foot long boards.
Enough for a small town.
Could feed a lot of termites.
Cause global warming with all that gut gas.
Thank god for Termite Eaters (formerly called anteaters).
Not as much gas generated from dead termites.
And the mammals are more energy efficient.
The only remaining problem to solve was.
What eats the Termite Eaters?

The things that used to eat the ant eaters.
Got confused with the name change.
Starved to death.
Most of them lived in Patagonia.
Down Argentina way.

Sigh.

Its summer there.
Nice and warm.
No snow.

The over population of anteaters now called Termite Eaters.
Has caused the World Wildlife Foundation to consider funding.
Japanese Termite Eater Hunting again.

After a period of years suspension.
Where the species was protected.
And feed steroids.
To make it eat more termites.
Help reduce the effects of Global Warming.

There is the potential that could bring on.
A whole new reality show.

Termite Eater Wars.

One of the rarely acknowledged benefits of Termite Eaters.
They have this remarkable quality of discouraging Cossacks.
No Cossacks have been observed in the wild in Patagonia.
Not since the Termite Eaters were renamed.

None at all.

The significance of this is that here is a natural limiter.
On horse dung.
In the region.
That reduces horse flies.
Horse fly eggs are a delicacy of termites.
A termite has been observed traveling.
Over 70 feet.
Just to sample fresh horse dung.

Large amounts of horse dung.
Had to be disposed of once upon a time.
In Patagonia.
When there were Cossacks.

It was shipped away in surplus WW II Liberty Ships.
While surplus WW II Liberty Ships .
Could also carry away termites.
And their Termite Eaters.
It was decided.
By Government edict.
That only horse dung.
would be so removed from Patagonia.

That was a very wise decision.
When one considers Termites.
But it was entirely possible.
For the Termite Eaters to have been gathered up.
After a while.
And shipped away.
On surplus Liberty Ships to.

Someplace.

But you can see the benefits of leaving.
The termite Eaters where they were.

No Cossacks.

Few decisions have had a greater influence On the environment of Patagonia.
Than continuing to deny.
Free Range to Cossacks.

But the surplus Liberty Ships.
Loaded with horse dung.
Would still have to find their way to.

Someplace.

Someplace....

Turned out to be the English Channel.
Large quantities of horse dung.
Were deposited there.
And slowly.
As in the effects of Global Warming.
Built up an uncharted reef.

Normally.
Horse dung does not form reefs.
Particularly in the English Channel.
But Patagonian horse dung.
Is special.
Rare among samples of horse dung.
Throughout the world.
These dungs contain reef forming characteristics.
When mixed with brackish waters.
Exposed to currents flowing.
Generally southwest.
And only southwest.
Due to the spin of the earth.
In northern latitudes.
Horse dung reefs can suddenly form.

And one did.

Into which the ICE PRINCE plowed unknowingly.
And was impaled.
Mangling its hull bottom plates.
Beyond emergency repair.
It could not continue to maintain buoyancy.

And it sank.

And you already know what happened to its load of wood.
So do the termites.
And that is the cause of the Global Warming.




02/12/2011

Posted on 02/13/2011
Copyright © 2020 Steven Craig

Member Comments on this Poem
Posted by E. A. Pugh on 02/13/11 at 04:31 AM

I am left speechless. I must do some Internet research to fully understand this! But what a captivating poem for me! usually if the poem is long I move on but for some reason yours held me all along. A very much appreciated unique subject for us to enjoy. *****(That’s the sound of me snapping)*****

Posted by Clara Mae Gregory on 02/13/11 at 06:09 AM

I have to say, Mr.Craig, that this is very very intellectually awesome.It does not seem so poetical in feeling yet it stirs the mind and gets it reeling. >The over population of anteaters now called termite eaters. Has caused the World Wildlife Foundation to consider funding. Japanese Termite Eater Hunting again.< There are so many good lines in this work, but the above in particular had me laughing and thinking about the deer here in North Carolina. (I hit 2 recently-and one was in the city limits during daylight). Anyway, thanks for posting. This was a delight to read...and reread...and rereread. :)

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