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When She’s Gone (Kairotic Moment: Watching Her Sleep)

by Richard Paez

When She's Gone (Kairotic Moment: Watching Her Sleep)

I am holding breath
and holding on
and holding still
my muscles, sinew, and tendons,
each beat and pulse and throbbing –
because a single word,
a single sigh,
a single blink of eye or slip of tongue
could send this holy spire crumbling, tumbling down.


And I’m holding breath
and holding still
and holding on
in my anticipation,
my hope and fear and longing –
absence that builds me up
and fills me up
so please hold me tight so that I do not
trip or crumble, slip or fall again.


And I’m holding breath
and holding on
and holding still
to the image of her spreading
across my field of vision –
          motionless and silent,
          less I disturb the dream
          for if she speaks a single word,
          if she lets loose a single sigh:
          her single blink of eye or flick of wrist
          could wipe me away
          and send this my holy spire spiraling down.

          I am holding breath
          and holding still
          and holding on
          until that kairotic moment
          when she returns
          to build me up
          and fill me up
          and show me what it’s like to live again.

06/25/2010

Author's Note: For Kim

Posted on 06/25/2010
Copyright © 2024 Richard Paez

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