I’m too old for your good ideas.
I want to drop a million in cash from the sky,
buy you a car, loan you some jewelry from my mother
and spend every Saturday night sleeping in until Friday morning.

It was easier when we were kids.

I remember that whole block of houses
where old men readied shotguns and old women were reimagining
their wedding day with stuffed animals and hostages
from all different parts of the interesting world.

Some of those properties had grass so tall that it could scratch
an attic window or scare someone who had drank too much and slept
right through the dreamy winter and into early spring.

You loved passing through them at night. I’m sure you promised
to marry me if I proved myself reasonably brave. Severe courage
in the act of knocking over mailboxes and throwing rocks
at those peace and love junkies
who just looked ridiculous in all that war paint.

I was around six when you started banging on my window
at eleven o’clock at night.

I think I was eight when you refused
to kiss me until the top floor of that six-story gas station
was completely on fire.

I’m not even sure how we got out of the top floor alive,
let alone through the rest of the place.
Around all those people who thought they had lived
well on into the triple digits but clearly hadn’t.

Past those boys who learned to drive at twelve
and how to break kneecaps at thirteen.

You never burst into tears.
You never had to steal cigarettes.
You still don’t get sick from drinking too much.
You still haven’t apologized to all those people
who will kill us if they ever figure out your pattern
of motels and lesser-known methods for crossing state lines.

You have the worst memory I’ve ever seen
and constantly pretend our relationship only goes back
to the last time I gave blood and stole a car in the same night.

I will say that was a pretty good night.

The money had potential
to last forever.
You kept grabbing my hand
at red lights.
I think I might have even heard
a kind word.

04/28/2010

Posted on 04/28/2010
Copyright © 2024 Gabriel Ricard