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determining

by Angela Thomas

i keep looking around at the words flying
around, metastasized, and all i can think
about is looking for an adult, hospice, to make
some kind of decision. keep waiting for someone

to step up, inoperable, and tell me exactly
what to do. my mother laying in the ICU, a nurse
helping her in and out of an electronic, chemotherapy,
bed, doctors reading notes made by other doctors

just within the last few days, their heads shaking
slightly, cancer, as they read the papers.
gazing directly into my eyes and testing the waters
as they drop bomb, terminal, after bomb,

months, after bomb, days. and i realize,
suddenly i am the adult here determining quality of life.

01/22/2010

Posted on 01/22/2010
Copyright © 2024 Angela Thomas

Member Comments on this Poem
Posted by V. Blake on 01/22/10 at 06:29 AM

I love the way the italics play into this poem--I think the format is called a trinity? At any rate, this whole piece is powerful, and slides across my soul like an icy shiver. Great write.

Posted by Gabriel Ricard on 01/22/10 at 12:43 PM

Definitely pushes us into some pretty grim, wonderfully written territory. Really enjoyed this.

Posted by George Hoerner on 01/23/10 at 01:57 AM

Very strong write lady. My wife has been a hospice nurse in a couple of different states about four of five years apart. It is hard to do for more than a couple of years. Unfortunately, too may people wait far too long before calling hospice into the situation. I realize there are many factors but for us quality of life for the patient should be a high priority. This is such an open and honest write. I would remove the "explicit" label so more people have a chance to see it. Very nice write.

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