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the floolish man builds more than houses on the sand

by Nanette Bellman

i was stupid to actually believe that we could make it.
that one day, you and i would walk hand in hand together.
i took your bait and swallowed the hook in the process.
i believed it when you said you didn't love her, that it was me.
how you promised i'd have your last name.

i had the all the tell tale signs in front of my eyes.
i knew it all along, i was just to foolish to admit it.
to everyone. to you. importantly, to myself.
i didn't want to admit it.

but when i asked you how you knew it was me,
that i was "the one", and you simply replied "because",
i called bullshit.
there are facts and there are feelings.
they say true love is blind and that maybe the case
but i'm telling you, there are little shards you notice.

you could have blown any smoke in my eyes,
but you weren't casanova enough to even do that.
you could have fed me the classics...
"because i can't live without you..."
"because you're so beautiful..."


and to think we could make it, after how we came to be.
to know i had defied someone i once loved,
and you were still doing it, still telling her that you did,
when you told me you didn't, you didn't love her.
that you loved me.
when it was evident to everyone we knew, but her,
that you didn't, that there was something between us.

i thought we could build our lives, our relationship
in the beauty of the beach, on the sand.
the closest to a castle i'd ever know.
that somehow the sun would dry out our something
and make us strong.
that there'd never be anymore questions, that we'd have trust,
that it would be picture perfect
when it was just us, just you and i.

but you know, i've never been good at not making waves.

11/28/2009

Author's Note: you know the story, the waves crashed up and the rain came down, destroying the house built on the sand.

Posted on 11/28/2009
Copyright © 2024 Nanette Bellman

Member Comments on this Poem
Posted by Johnny Crimson on 11/28/09 at 07:41 PM

*this sounds like every conversation we've ever had when you've asked for advice and didn't like my answers. ha. This is you being aware too late. And you've explained it beautifully.

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