When we first met
our agreement was
to always wear our hearts
on our sleeves

no games, no guessing,
yet here I am
fighting the urge
to initiate contact
with you

one day at a time
all half breaths
and stomach drops
like I’m coming off
an addiction

waiting
long enough
for emotions to overcome
the reasons why
this will never work.

When we first met
I lied to you in embarrassment
about something
I knew a great deal about –
folding under your
insulting critique

and even when
your body answered
all my questions in good form,
I still rolled over
afterward

staring at walls
that understood
better than I
the limitations
of such orchestrated
moments

my dreams
would never
be contained
within the four corners
of your bed.

When we first met
relief rarely came
from arrangements
in a song

but lately
the wave lengths
lift me up
above the loneliness

and I am filled
with a satisfaction
I’ve never known
could be

My whole existence
smiles
at the thought
of no longer wanting you.

and I can finally breathe.

04/22/2009

Posted on 04/23/2009
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