Tito Buys a Car

by Steven Craig

Like to Mr. Williamsonivich

Hey ahhh duh doh doh doh like man I got this great red '61 minx from russia, copied from real car made someplace else, minx is like a 3 cylinder with 4 nearly round tires and it has a few holes in seat and all that which russia cars have. I mean, like, when like they make these minx cars, they like put body outside in the rain to age for few months unprimed, just to like build up a rough and like nearly ready appearance. Then, like man, they make you give them key, and they like store car in barn with doors open under chickens until it has turned red.

Mine was like red when I bought it new for 65,899 rubles, but after parking it under the trees in like baltimore and other places like that, like its now white and green, so i figure its got added extra like value for all these after market options like.

so like, i want to trade red mavel car in on a that pickup red truck that has like proven itself like hero of Soviet Union, with all the like examples of its longevity having miles apparent on the tires and seating arrangements, and welts on the frame like. There must be deal we can work out, like you give me say 89,945 rubles trade-in, and I can maybe like come up with change like found in the parking lots along that rt.30 lincoln way road, and like get 2.31$ after conversion from like rubles.

And its ok if like its not black.

Like, what would the monthly payments be like, and like could they be only half that? I are russian and have only a few rubles but the minx must be done away with and new well proven like truck like rig would be looked upon by fearless leader as a new adventure into capitalism. like, how much?

Can I trade in like 3 miss matched pairs of shoes? They still have sole, so some Hip Hop band guy would pay big for them like many rubles in old Soviet Union. Like if they need accessories, I have spell check that works in both russian and english american western capitalistic pig language.

I get in my formerly red minx now and drive there to see you before ice on bearing sea melts and makes me late.

Tito Rusky


Author's Note: When you want to buy a car, use the new modern method of email transactions like Tito. And avoid the 'bearing sea'.

Posted on 03/07/2009
Copyright © 2020 Steven Craig

Member Comments on this Poem
Posted by Gabriel Ricard on 03/07/09 at 01:28 AM

Heh. Interesting...

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