ash caught in my hair, remembering
campfire and woodsmoke in a basement dive bar
know you are too sly for me
loyalty and rebellion i know you're leaving

i wish for something i dont even
no longer want to have to believe in.

two days ago the
dense sleep on plaid flannel sheets
in the attic slanted ceiling room i, too gullible
to know my stupid sleep on diseases
i want to believe. i want to believe you.
back to concrete wall
i dipped my hair into my drink and sucked it
what
am i doing
here ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
face to toilet
i hold on but i don't mean it.
tissues and pillows and
slinky minx you slide away from me before i breathe
sit down
good god.

the tiles
all i can think about are the pristine tiles between dirty grout
drunk in the bathtub again
my back arched and you are gone. you are leaving. you just left.

11/19/2008

Posted on 11/19/2008
Copyright © 2024 Katie Dean