what can i give you
that i havent already given?
perhaps the stars in my eyes?
maybe the gnashing of my teeth..
ask me for it and i'll give you
the beating of my heart.

.......

what have i been to you?
a bird crashing against your window?
a wave crashing against your shore?
have i been a shooting star?
have i been a rose
or a thorn?

.......

what can i say to you?
can i say i love you, and mean it?
can i say i hear your voice when you speak?
can i say i feel your fingers entwined in mine
or are you more a ghost?
can i tell you stories of when i was a child
and know you'll hear them?
will you, at that moment, understand the gift
i am giving you?
is this a gift?

........

will i have answers for you
when you ask me what have i done?
will i say yes when you ask me to open my legs?
will i cut stripes up and down my body
and bruises across my face with words in my mind
afterwards?
will the guilt and shame slowly strangle me
and decay our marriage?
will i remember that you love me?

........

i could smash my head against the wall
and give you the blood.
i'll give you the gleam of my razorblade.
the emptiness of my plate.
i'll give you my secret parts
and then cry afterward.
i'll question your motives
and beg you to stay.
i'll push you away
and blame you for leaving.
i'll tear at your skin
and kiss at the wounds i make.
i'll dry your tears
as fast as i cause them.
i'll give you everything i have
everything i am
everything i can
and suck and suck it back out of you
till you have nothing left at all
and then i'll thank you for it
thank you for all you've given me
thank you for loving me endlessly
thank you for allowing me to love you.

09/10/2008

Posted on 09/10/2008
Copyright © 2026 Vikki Owens