A southern cross to bare

by A. Paige White

Ok y'all.
I'm getting ready to write something.
I guarantee, I will misquote myself.
So beware, I will likely misquote you as well.

When I say, 'Glad to know ya.'
That's a question.

Durn. I think I dispelled something.
No. The spellchecker’s not broke.

Bare with me.
This is my naked soul you’re reading here.
If you can’t read it naked, don’t read it at all.

If you do read it, don’t follow the instructions you might find there.
But do think about any suggestions I might offer.
Act quickly!

I might be pmsing tomorrow.
And those suggestions might regress into a temper tantrum the likes of which, my children tremble even thinking about stepping into.
Mama fits are legendary in my home.

If I’m foaming at the mouth, you might want to come back tomorrow and read this.
Naked .

That’s pronounced nekkid.
None of this Nakid crap.

Then again, you might decide never to return.
If I’m pmsing, I will bless
my God.
Fit came to pass.

Only the most courageous, or the ones that are just plain stuck with me, will return.
That’s just alright.
I may regret it today, but I might be pmsing tomorrow.
You know the rest of this verse.

It’s a refrain.
So you might want to refrain.

I think these verses are broken in the middle
But that’s ok, I’m a southern cross
To bare.

I am making plans to create personalized leisure cards.
None of my business if you’re stoopid.
So that’s why they won’t be business cards.

If you decided to ignore my instructions
But you've given thought to my suggestions
And you're still here

You're stoopid.

Don't take that wrong.
Being a stoopid person myself,
my favorite people are stoopid.
You might enjoy a personalized leisure card from my heart today.
If you don't, It's ok.
I might be pmsing tomorrow.


Author's Note: Inspired by Ali's plea to the universe that resonated inside this sister sufferer... ;-D Love you girl!***p.s. I have no idea why sometimes in certain places, apostrophes don't show up and just leave gaps where they used to be.... looks like some kinda streeeeeeeeeeeeeetch.... ;-}

Posted on 08/15/2008
Copyright © 2021 A. Paige White

Member Comments on this Poem
Posted by George Hoerner on 08/15/08 at 03:59 PM

Well done lady. And y'all stop that psming and have a blessed day.

Posted by Alison McKenzie on 08/15/08 at 04:06 PM

You crack me up, baby!!! ROTFL!!! And your play on words is superb! But I'm tellin ya, this PMS thing just about implodes my house these days. I'm gonna lose my tongue from bitin' it clean off!

Posted by Joe Cramer on 08/15/08 at 04:57 PM

Paige... this is brilliant.... I could not rate it high enough!

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