when you have it,
when you've really got
it,
you know,
the way it seeps into you
and taunts you into dreaming,
this unconscious joust and jostle
into realization...

well you just know.

unfortunately,
everyone that thinks they've got it,
all find out sooner or later that they're mad.

they talk about knowing it,
and feeling it,
living it, even.
they tell someone,
and suddenly they're crazy.

you simply stand up,
and you announce to the world,
"by God, i've got it!"
and they lock you up,
and so you wished that you'd said nothing at all.

everything you've ever understood
up until that point is nil,
until you know it.

not to mention explaining it.
that's nearly impossible.
once you do that, they start medicating you,
dripping into your bloodstream
until it's a vague sameness,
an unearthed demon erasing everything
you've ever sought out just to find it.

that's why you're afraid,
isn't it?
that's why we're all afraid.
because those of us who think we've got it
can't talk about it.
once we tell anyone we know what it is,
what it means,
that we understand it once and for all,
then that's it,
it's done for.

that's why we don't talk about it.
we go on our days all jolly good
about our business,
buying our bread and milk
and soaking our feet into hot baths,
tucking in our children and kissing our lovers goodnight.

well underneath all this routine,
this hubbub of good nature,
the very potent source of it is
thickening and boiling into us and retracting
our shallow breaths into asphyxiating comprehension.

so we sit and stare and hold our heads
babbling "i don't get it..."

but some of us do.

well,
i get it,
i know what it is.

but i'm not telling you.

you'd think me mad.

03/08/2008

Posted on 03/08/2008
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