Can you see the imperfections

That I'm trying to hide

I store them away with this pain

I keep behind my hazel eyes

I'm fading back into the darkness

The shadows of your lives

And I hope you lie awake restlessly

Thinking of my demise

I break myself down

And I rely on you to build me back up

My walls are made of brick

And you're my cement

Without you it seems

Nothing in my life makes sense

Then again

You confuse me..

There were days in the past

That I would sit awake and cry

Thinking of all the things you told me

Wondering if anything wasn't a lie

I took a silver razor

Rusted from tip to end

I drug it across my flesh

Until I could feel the burn again...

Those days have again, since long passed

And I still miss the heat of that blade

But to stop it was all you could ask

And lovingly, I obeyed

....Because that was my relief

My pain escaped through the blood

That left my veins

Right there on my left wrist

I wasn't trying to kill myself

I was trying to kill the memories

Of you

Of her

Of them

Nobody else noticed

The summer heat

The sweatshirts

It all added up easily

And yet no one cared

Or was it that

No one cared to notice..

Either way

It was my cry for help

I was dying inside

And killing myself over you

All of you

For the things you had said to me

The things you had done

I wasn't strong enough to live for myself

That came years later

And I still struggle with that

Each and every day

But for now I choose to believe

My imperfections make me perfect

Because that Is just who I am

Take it

Or leave it

09/21/2006