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Cat Lady

by Maria Francesca

one cat
then two cats
then three cats
then four

I don't even bother
with men anymore

five cats
then six cats
then seven and eight

I don't shave my legs
and I don't stay out late

nine, ten, eleven -
hey, why not a dozen -

all good families need
a weird 'Cat Lady' cousin!

I'll dress them in cat clothes
I'll throw them cat parties
I'll call them all man-names
like Richard and Marty

and Steven and Stanley
and Buford and Earl -
(I never could figure cat boys from cat girls)

they'll all go to kitty-school
earn cat diplomas
they'll fill up my house
with that cat box aroma

but kitties don't ever
leave toilet seats up
or leave me for bimbos
with double-D cups;

they don't bark or snarl
or slobber all day -
(neither do girls,
but I don't swing that way)

they're friendly and warm
always there when you need 'em;
they'll love you forever
(as long as you feed 'em)

so pooh-pooh to all men
and great danes
and toy poodles -

I'm settling down
with my kitty caboodle.

07/24/2006

Posted on 05/04/2007
Copyright © 2024 Maria Francesca

Member Comments on this Poem
Posted by Genevieve Sturrock on 05/04/07 at 02:25 PM

LOL! this is wonderfully hilarious.

Posted by Rhiannon Jones on 05/06/07 at 02:09 AM

Love it! This is great fun.

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